Chris Hicks: Meet the new movies, same as the old movies

Published: Sunday, Jan. 19 2014 5:35 p.m. MST

Remakes: “RoboCop,” “About Last Night,” “Endless Love,” “Godzilla,” “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles,” and “Hercules” — yes there’s a “Hercules” remake in theaters right now, but this is yet another one, opening in July.

Sequels: “Muppets Most Wanted,” “300: Rise of an Empire,” “A Haunted House 2,” “Captain America: The Winter Soldier,” “Rio 2,” “The Amazing Spider-Man 2,” “X-Men: Days of Future Past,” “22 Jump Street,” "How to Train Your Dragon 2,” “Think Like a Man Too,” “Transformers: Age of Distinction,” “Dawn of the Planet of the Apes,” “Planes: Fire & Rescue,” “Hercules,” “The Expendables 3,” “Sin City: A Dame to Kill For.”

Animated features: “The Lego Movie,” yet another cartoon based on a toy; “The Wind Rises,” a World War II story animated by Hayao Miyazaki; “Mr. Peabody & Sherman,” based on the characters from the old “Rocky & Bullwinkle” TV series, along with the aforementioned animated sequels. But nothing from Pixar this year, more’s the pity.

Comic-book/novel fantasies: “I, Frankenstein,” placing Mary Shelley’s monster (Aaron Eckhart) in a dystopian future (from the trailer, it looks like “Frankenstein Meets Underworld”); “Vampire Academy,” about good and evil bloodsuckers; “Winter’s Tale,” with Colin Farrell in love with a woman who dies but will be reincarnated; “Edge of Tomorrow,” about a futuristic soldier (Tom Cruise) caught in a “Groundhog Day”-style time loop.

Thrillers: “3 Days to Kill,” with a dying Secret Service agent given a second chance; “Non-Stop,” the latest action picture starring Liam Neeson, set aboard an international flight; “Need for Speed,” adapted from a video game; “Sabotage,” an Arnold Schwarzenegger vehicle; “Welcome to Yesterday,” about teens finding plans for a time machine; “Divergent,” about teens in an authoritarian future; “Transcendence,” with Johnny Depp as a dying scientist who downloads his mind into a computer.

Raunchy comedies: “Bad Words,” Jason Bateman’s directing debut has him getting revenge on a children’s spelling bee; “St. Vincent De Van Nuys,” with a boy befriending a misanthropic neighbor, starring Melissa McCarthy and Bill Murray; “Neighbors,” about new parents (Seth Rogan, Rose Byrne) beset by a fraternity that moves into the neighborhood; “Blended,” Adam Sandler reteams with Drew Barrymore as single parents who meet at a resort; “A Million Ways to Die in the West,” a Western spoof co-written, directed by and starring Seth Macfarlane (“Ted”); “Tammy,” with Melissa McCarthy and Susan Sarandon as daughter and mother.

Just makes you want to run down to your friendly neighborhood theater and order advance tickets, doesn’t it?

Chris Hicks is the author of "Has Hollywood Lost Its Mind? A Parent’s Guide to Movie Ratings." Website: www.hicksflicks.com

Email: hicks@deseretnews.com

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