Deseret News Archives
Fifty years ago last week, President Kennedy gave a major address in Salt Lake City. It’s uncanny how current that speech remains, especially the part about how the NSA has to listen to all American phone calls.
Interestingly, he said if something called “email” ever was invented, Washington would listen to that, too.
It’s clear, though, that a half-century has changed many things. Kennedy spoke about the dangers of Cuba under Fidel Castro. Hmm. Well, there must have been something in that speech that no longer applies.
Sure, the Senate could use a good, 21-hour discussion about how to fix the nation’s tax-and-spend problem and chart a course for the future. But it’s disheartening that, when they finally devoted 21 hours to something last week, it resulted in an impassioned reading of “Green Eggs and Ham.”
Texas Sen. Ted Cruz spent 21 hours in a “non-filibuster” to speak against Obamacare. As part of this, he read from the popular Dr. Seuss book. But as long as he was being Seussian, why didn’t he make up a few lines of his own? Here are some suggestions:
“I do not like Obamacare. I want the feds out of my hair.
I do not like Obamacare, and so the voters I will scare.
I do not like to compromise; I’d rather poke you in the eyes.
I think your plan will cost a lot. I want it killed. I’d like it shot.
I do not like the big mandate. Do not like? I think I hate.
I will not fund Obamacare. I will not sit down in my chair.
I plan to shout and talk all day. For your health plan I will not pay.
I plan to shout and talk all night, even if my rhymes are trite.
I will not read from “My pet goat,” though the ghost of Bush be at my throat.
Instead I read from Dr. Seuss; it sure beats funding a health care ruse.
I know I look just like a clown. I’d rather shut the nation down.
I do not have another plan. I will not fund this, Cruz I am.”
The irony, of course, is that in the end of “Green Eggs and Ham,” Sam actually tries the food and likes it. Don’t look for life to imitate art.
Members of Congress, meanwhile, shouldn’t be surprised if Americans soon splatter them with Oobleck.
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