Ask Angela: Marriage: I think no, he thinks yes — now what?
My boyfriend and I have been praying about getting married. I’ve received a very clear “No,” while he says he continues to get the answer “Yes, we should do it.” When I told him the answer to my prayers he said, “You must be praying wrong, keep praying and let me know when you get the right answer.”
His kind of annoying response aside, how can I know if I should marry him once and for all?
Good call on putting his response aside. In fact, put it as far to the side as you possibly can.
Trust the answer that you received from the Lord and politely (if you feel like being polite) say goodbye to the man (boy?) who doesn’t trust your ability to receive revelation.
Easier said than done — but really, remember the counsel of Elder Jeffrey R. Holland of the Quorum of the Twelve of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. He said, while talking about decision-making, “With any major decision there are cautions and considerations to make, but once there has been illumination, beware the temptation to retreat from a good thing. If it was right when you prayed about it and trusted it and lived for it, it is right now. Don’t give up when the pressure mounts.”
In your scenario, your “illumination” was a very clear answer from your Father in heaven. The “good thing” was learning through prayer that someone is not right for you and the “pressure” that is mounting is someone trying to dissuade you from something that you know and feel deeply to be correct.
You know what to do. No one can give you a better answer than the one you’ve already received. Trust yourself on this one.
Readers: What is your process for making tough decisions? Have your choices ever caused your loved ones to doubt you? How do you deal?
Angela Trusty is a young adult advice columnist. Twitter: angelatrusty
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