Ask Angela: When a woman's male best friend has a girlfriend
My good friend’s girlfriend doesn’t want him hanging out with me because she’s jealous. So he doesn’t. What kind of friend is that? Should I just cut ties with him?
— Kind of Hurt
Dear Kind of Hurt,
This is exactly why having and keeping MBFFs (Male Best Friends Forever) is almost impossible. Their JGFs (Jealous Girlfriends) always get weird.
Technically, I should ask for more information. Like, do you have any romantic feelings for this guy? Does he have any romantic feelings for you? What is your relationship history with him? Does she have a reason to be jealous? Of what exactly is she jealous?
But if he's already decided not to see you, then your energy is better spent on improving your current relationships and developing new ones. He can worry about explaining or not explaining how he feels about you to the JGF.
As far as "cutting ties" goes, that course of action can have such finality to it and feel really unnatural. You may also start to feel bitter and angry — which feelings will only harm yourself. So don't cut ties, just shift your focus. But remember how this feels, so in the future if you're in the same situation, be the one who values the friendship enough to make it work even though your circumstances have changed.
Reader questions: Is it possible for girls and guys to be close friends when one of them is in a relationship? If so, how is that accomplished?
- Dog reacts to LDS missionary returning home...
- Mentor to Brandon Mull, James Dashner chose...
- LDS Family Services providing free online...
- Jewish woman launches modest online...
- Book recounts LDS Church history using Legos
- Why I make my kids go to church
- Elder Holland calls on Christians to unite to...
- Doug Robinson: A Boy Scout for 75 years ......
- Elder Holland calls on Christians to... 99
- Defending the Faith: Even in science,... 72
- Why I make my kids go to church 55
- Jewish woman launches modest online... 18
- K2 The Church's grand opening a... 11
- Netanyahu speech deepens rift between... 8
- Doug Robinson: A Boy Scout for 75 years... 7
- Activists: Islamic State group now... 5