It's a funny thing ... Mormon Times readers tell humorous stories

Published: Tuesday, April 24 2012 5:00 a.m. MDT

My dear brother Aaron was in three bishoprics for 11 years. Upon release as bishop, he was finally able to sit with his youngest daughter, a 10-year-old, in sacrament meeting. As they sang the opening song, he, being a good strong bass, sang the bass part while she sang the melody/soprano part. After the song was halfway through, his daughter said to him: “Dad, don’t you know the tune?” That made him laugh because she had never heard him sign bass before.

— Virgil Johnson, Kimberly, Idaho

Our 5-year old grandson, Joshua, was visiting his mother’s parents, who are not of our faith. They asked him what he learned in church. He replied, “I’m learning about the Book of Norman.” When asked who Norman was, Joshua said, “He’s some guy who’s dead but he wrote a book and we’re learning about it.” Needless to say, this took some explaining on our part.

Sydney Koerner, Voorhees, N.J.

At one sacrament meeting, the male half of a semi-elderly couple was asked to say the opening prayer. They took aisle seats about three rows back to facilitate the assignment. However, during the preliminaries and opening hymn, the brother fell fast asleep. As the hymn came to a close, his slumber continued. After an awkward pause, his wife soundly elbowed him in the ribs and proclaimed, “Marion, get up and say the prayer.” Coming suddenly and a bit rudely awake, he stumbled to the podium and gave the closing prayer.

— John P. MacLean

A few years ago, we were living in Samoa with our grandson Russel, he being 5 at the time. One afternoon, Talafu, the brother of my husband, and Moroni, the son of their sister, paid us a visit. We introduced them to Russel, who looked at them and said, “That can’t be Moroni. He’s not standing on the temple.” He was always very observant.

— Kathleen Gasu, West Jordan, Utah

Our ward had become enormous due to a new housing development within its boundaries. It became obvious the stake would have to divide us and realign the boundaries of about four wards. It was the subject of some strong emotions, as many of us had lived in the same ward for 30 years and had become fast friends. The stake presidency called a special meeting to announce the new ward boundaries and were aware of the feelings of the members. Some of the tension was eased and there was laughter when the stake president announced the opening hymn, “I'll Go Where You Want Me to Go.”

— Wilson Brown, Rexburg, Idaho

A few months ago we came home from church on a fast Sunday. Our 9-year-old son was complaining about being hungry since he had been fasting and was wanting a snack. We encouraged him to hold on another 30 minutes or so as dinner was almost ready. Then our 4-year-old walked into the kitchen and said, “Daddy, can I have snack? I’m not fasting, I’m slowing!”

— Stephi Johnson, Weiser, Idaho

When our children were very young, I came to realize that even when we were praying together, united as one in family prayer, we weren’t all necessarily praying for the same things. When it was my husband’s turn to pray, he would frequently ask Heavenly Father to “bless our loved ones in their righteous endeavors.” After several years, our daughter, Jessica, finally asked, “Mommy, why does Daddy always pray for the righteous in Denver?”

— Diana Grandy, Kearns, Utah

When a new family moved into the neighborhood, our young son found an immediate friend with their little boy of the same age. We had heard that two new teachers had been hired at the high school and wondered if the boy’s father was one of them, so at the dinner table we asked our son if the boy’s father was a teacher. He could hardly finish eating before he ran off to play again with his new friend. When we called him later to come home for the evening, the first thing he said was, “His dad is not a teacher. He is a high priest.”

— J. Blake, Richfield, Utah

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