Rock On: Niners coach moves to the fancy stuff

FOOD FOR THOUGHT

Niners quarterback Colin Kaepernick caused a stir last week when he said his favorite eatery was Red Robin. When RR executives heard the news, they offered him free food for life if the Niners won the Super Bowl.

Maybe it's a good thing San Francisco lost. If you combined Kaepernick's favorite — the Whiskey River BBQ Chicken Sandwich — with a Monster Milkshake and fries, that's around 2,000 calories. Which raises the obvious question: If he ate there every day, how long would "for life" actually be?

PLAYBOOK MALFUNCTION

Sources say a few minutes after being called for an illegal formation on the Super Bowl's first play, Niners coach Jim Harbaugh called out: "OK, let's go to the 'trickeration package.' Turn out the lights!"

THE UNINVITED

Baltimore Ravens cheerleader Courtney Lenz was not selected to perform at the Super Bowl. Early stories said she was rejected because she was retiring after the game, so she received no invitation. A day or two later she said it was because she had gained a pound and a half.

Either way, it doesn't look good for the Ravens. Ray Lewis is retiring, so how come he didn't stay home? As for weight issues, no team that has Terrence Cody on its roster should ban someone due to weight fluctuations.

TIED OFF

Dixie High basketball coach Ryan Cuff made news last week for getting teed up after throwing off his necktie during a game.

Rick Majerus was a sweater guy, so it's not hard to imagine what might have happened under the wrong circumstances there.

HOMEWORK REQUIRED

Jose Canseco has once again torpedoed himself on Twitter. Recently he tweeted out to nearly a half-million followers: "I need to find Manute Bol."

Bol died nearly three years ago.

How come the only thing Canseco seems clued in on is who used steroids?

PUBLICITY CHALLENGED

Twitter was down for a few hours last week.

Sources say Canseco got so depressed he rented an aerial banner and a bullhorn to let people know he's still looking for Bol.

CHILLING OUT

Some rumors say with the Super Bowl in New Jersey next year, there may not be a halftime show. Why?

Too cold.

Rock On wouldn't give up so easily. If they need something that works in frosty conditions, why not just resurrect the Romney-Obama debates?

SAFE ZONE

Left Coast Sports Babe: "Roger Goodell said this morning he would "absolutely" let his son play football. Brave words from a man with two daughters."

email: rock@desnews.com

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