Rock on: Jerry Sloan giving Jazz the onceover

JERRY-RIGGED

Jerry Sloan appeared at a Jazz game Saturday for the first time since since retiring in 2011.

The former coach sat quietly, though Rock On thinks he heard him scream: "You guys need to stop this $@#!! jack-potting around!" when the Jazz trailed by 13.

In case you're wondering, yes, they were playing like they were wearing tuxedos.

FANDEMONIUM

Another of Sloan's favorite adages was that if you listen to the fans, you'll end up sitting with them.

Which raises the obvious question: What was that guy in Row 37 saying when Sloan decided to quit?

AT WAR

As media awaited word regarding Metta World Peace's vicious elbow on Sunday, headline writers everywhere were shifting into overdrive.

Likely candidate for most-used headline of the week: "NBA suspends World Peace."

Or maybe this one, on the odds of him appearing in the playoffs: "World Peace doubtful."

DREAM TEAM

A report in ESPN the Magazine estimates 40-60 percent of the Oregon football team smokes marijuana.

Does that include the people who designed the uniforms?

BEHIND THE MIKE

The death of TV newsman Mike Wallace caused some Twitter followers to believe it was actually the Steelers' receiver by the same name.

"Steelers fans are safe for a while," noted Yahoo.com's Chris Chase, "at least until a hot college prospect named Morley Safer catches the eye of scouts."

GAME READY

The Lingerie Football League is canceling its 2012 season in order to market the sport abroad.

The league reportedly will launch again in the U.S. next April. Meanwhile, it says it is focusing on an introduction in Canada, as well as tours to Mexico City, Sydney, Brisbane and Asian cities.

In other words, it's expanding to places where they don't understand football, but might understand lingerie.

WEIS MAN

New Kansas coach Charlie Weis chewed out his team at a spring practice for not celebrating enough on a field goal.

Weis set things up for a "game-winning" kick and told his players to celebrate accordingly. When they didn't respond enthusiastically enough, he launched into a mini-rant.

"I can tell you guys aren't used to winning," he said.

Just thinking: If he really wanted guys to over-celebrate kicking goals, why not recruit some soccer players?

email: rock@desnews.com

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