Short-term marriage loss

When I read the news about Kim Kardashian's marriage to Kris Humphries coming to a short end, I was tempted to join the throngs of public stone throwers.

"IS THERE NO SANCTITY IN MARRIAGE?"

"WHAT ABOUT COMMITTMENT?"

"THIS MARRIAGE WAS A MONEY-DRIVEN SHAM."

Instantly there were jokes with punchlines answering, "What lasts longer than Kim Kardashian's marriage?" (My favorite: leftover Halloween candy.)

It was a 72-day affair from vow to filing. I'm sure there were still presents left to be opened, thank-you notes left to write, ink to dry on the marriage certificate.

But at some point in getting caught up in the press releases and the births of new Kardashian-themed hashtags on Twitter, I was humbly reminded that I once had a short marriage myself — a roller-coaster relationship made official in June and ended in December, and which, like Kim's, had been preceded by a swift engagement of four weeks.

I will never forget going to my last semester in college just after I had ended my marriage. I ran into two high school friends at the same time.

"Hey! I just found out you got married! I didn't know! I can't believe you got married and didn't tell me," said one.

"You're married? I didn't know either!" said the other.

I took a deep breath and exhaled the pride I had left.

"I was married and now I am divorcing."

Sober news to follow up such happy campus-ringing congratulations. That little instance will go down as one of the most embarrassing few moments of my life. Though my friends were kind to me in their reactions, I walked away feeling socially and emotionally defeated.

For the months I was married I had juggled a job, college, wifery and full-time thank-you-note writing. I was narrowly fixated on making sure everyone who had given us a gift, a monetary donation, a bridal shower, a wink or a kiss got a proper thank-you note. I'd go to the park in the afternoons and sit on a bench, writing and writing notes of appreciation until my hands were cramped. If marriage wasn't what I had expected it to be, it might have been my duty-bound insistence to get all those thank-you notes written.