Pornography hurts relationships, employment and well-being

SALT LAKE CITY — The consumption of pornography "breaks hearts," said Mark H. Willes, president and CEO of Deseret Management Corporation.

Offering the keynote address at the 10th annual Conference on "Protecting Children and Families from Pornography and other Harmful Materials," Willes said popular culture teaches that pornography is no big deal, it doesn’t hurt anyone and everybody does it.

"If you don't remember anything else I hope you remember this: This is not a victimless act," he said, noting that pornography puts relationships, employment, healthy sexuality and well-being at risk.

More than 700 people gathered in downtown Salt Lake City for the conference, sponsored by the Utah Coalition Against Pornography. The event, held in the Little America Hotel, also included several sessions on topics such technology, prevention and recovery, the impact of pornography on marriages, and how to talk about dangerous things.

Willes centered his remarks on the Deseret Management Corporation anti-pornography initiative, "Out in the Light," which focuses on women who are married to men addicted to pornography.

Nationally, he said, 47 percent of people report that pornography affects their family.

"We conducted our own research with almost 600 women along the Wasatch Front," he said. "Fifty-four percent of those women say they know somebody who struggles with pornography."

Willes showed video clips of women talking about the devastating impact of their husbands' pornography use; one woman spoke of lying on her face, sobbing and sobbing.

"No man has any right to make his wife feel that way," he said. "No man has any right to subject her to his addiction."

Willes asked women to remember that their husband’s addiction is not their fault and emphasized that with effort and professional help, recovery is possible.

"It is easy to judge those that are addicted to pornography. We need to be careful not to do that," he added. "We don't know the struggles they have had. We do know that they need love and support. They need a helping hand."

He also asked parents to talk to their children about pornography.

"We cannot begin too early to talk to our children about this plague," he said. "By the way, they know more than you think they know. In fact, if they are 10 or older, they have probably already seen it."