Internet changing the way people mourn

One week after the June 19, 2005, car accident that left 14-year-old Tori Schmanski with a serious brain injury, her father started a blog.

The first entry on pray4tori.com started simply: "This blog is where I will enter all of my daily notes and stories on Tori's progress," Tim Schmanski wrote.

His motivation was simple: He just needed a way to tell people how his daughter was doing.

"It was an optimal way to keep a lot of people updated on Tori and her progress," Schmanski said. "We were inundated with phone calls by the hundreds, and there's no way you can keep up with those."

That simple post began what would become four years of meticulously tracking his daughter's progress. The blog chronicled the family's journey to China, where Tori underwent stem-cell treatments. It noted her good and bad days, the steps forward and the setbacks. And when Tori died Nov. 7 after succumbing to a virus, that was written there, too.

In an ever-changing landscape of technological advances, the way people are connecting, communicating and even experiencing the inevitabilities of life are changing, too.

As the Internet has become commonplace and the accessibility of blogs and Web sites like Facebook and MySpace have made even some of life's most joyous and tragic events easy to share, it has also become a place to connect with others in times of mourning. A place to connect with others who can understand and relate.

For his family, Schmanski said the blog was a source of comfort and support.

"It was wonderful," he said. "People could also put their input in, and it was always nice to read a lot of generous, kind, supportive thoughts on the site. It really helped myself and the family, reading those and knowing that there are so many people that care about us and our story."

The Web site helped connect them to other families with members in similar situations from all over the nation and even as far away as London and Prague. He said that as the site gained more hits, it came up more regularly on search engines like Google. Anyone searching the term "brain injury" often found their way to the site.

"There were a lot of people looking for information on their own," he said. "I was very detailed in what I put in regards to Tori, in terms of procedures and what we were doing to help her, and it intrigued other people kind of in the same situation. A lot of people called and e-mailed asking for advice and for help. Tori's site was kind of revolutionary. It served a good purpose."