A 2009 Christmas playlist: 26 songs for the season

Christmas music doesn't have to jingle with the same old silver-bell ho-ho-hum. Nothing against Nat King Cole — and by the way, if you're seeking a tried, true, and altogether classy holiday option, his "The Christmas Song" collection has just been reissued for the umpteenth time.

What follows is a CD-length holiday playlist that often diverges from the well-worn path. From SpongeBob Square-Pants to Sting, however, they're all in tune with the season, even if the singing sea creature cheerily advises us, "Don't Be a Jerk (It's Christmas)," while the Police man spends most of his "If on a Winter's Night ..." album indulging his crusty, cranky side.

All 26 tracks on this year's list were released — or in a few cases, reissued — in 2009. Not all the big-name holiday discs are represented. The Andrea Bocelli, Tori Amos, and David Archuleta albums do not appear — but most do, from Neil Diamond to Bob Dylan to Sugarland.

(My apologies to Sen. Orrin Hatch, R-Utah, for not including the Mormon lawmaker's festive "Eight Days of Hanukkah," downloadable for free on the Tablet Magazine Web site. If it had made the cut, I would have had to play it repeatedly, and "Eight Days" is a gift that ceases giving after the first listen.)

1. "Santa Claus Is Coming to Town," by The Jackson 5. The 12-year-old Michael, in the big-Afro'd, innocent days of 1970. Included on both "Jackson 5: Ultimate Christmas Collection" and the excellent double disc "The Ultimate Motown Christmas Collection."

2. "We Three Kings," by Los Straitjackets. Twangy, surf-rock rave-up from this Mexican-wrestling-mask-wearing Nashville outfit's winning "Yuletide Beat" (Yep Roc).

3. "Must Be Santa," by Bob Dylan. On the whole, the Bard's charity fund-raiser "Christmas in the Heart" is a deeply confusing mind-blower. Can he possibly be serious, craggily crooning "Hark the Herald Angels Sing"? Don't put it past him. There's no confusion about this kicky polka, however. It's a gas.

4. "Don't Be a Jerk (It's Christmas)," by SpongeBob SquarePants. Do unto others message — "Don't put people down, or leave the toilet seat up" — from animated yellow rectangle, suitable for all ages.

5. "It Doesn't Often Snow at Christmas," by Pet Shop Boys. Especially not in Merry Old England. "Bing Crosby, are you listening to me?" Neil Tennant asks in this 1997 fan-club offering finally loosed on the world at large. The Boys' "Christmas" EP (101 Distribution) is mislabeled, as this is the only holiday cut, but it's a disco-ready winner.