Miley Cyrus and I can climb a mountain

I'm going to admit something at the risk of making millions, if not billions, of faithful followers of this column question my masculinity.

Deep breath. Exhale.

Scratch nose. Pop knuckles. Grunt, groan, growl.

OK, I'm ready for the big, personal reveal:

Hannah Montana made me cry.

OK, it was actually Miley Cyrus who helped open up my tear ducts, but that doesn't sound quite as dramatic as Hannah Montana making a grown man weepy.

Either way, I'll just leave my Man Card on the desk.

Would it help if I said my eyes just got extra sweaty?

So, why the crybaby confessional?

As has been well-chronicled — and noticeable by my expanding body — I've struggled with my weight-loss efforts since summer.

I've wanted to lose weight.

I just wanted the extra slices of pizza, the handfuls of M&Ms and the ice cream even more. It was kind of relaxing to not have to worry about exercising while basking in my laziness as well.

That's made me feel lousy.

Then I heard a song by Cyrus.

You might even say it was good for my achy, breaky heart.

I can almost see it, that dream I'm dreaming. But there's a voice inside my head saying, "You'll never reach it." Every step I'm taking, every move I make feels lost with no direction, my faith is shaking.

But I gotta keep trying, gotta keep my head held high.

Have you ever heard something that just hit you? Boom! This song did it for me. (FYI, I heard it on a pop radio station, not on her TV show. I do have some manly dignity left.)

I watched my health and fitness dreams slip out of my hands for the past half-year, and I just hadn't been able to stop myself from eating.

And eating. And eating. And ...

I've been so exasperated and emotional about my rapid weight gain that the message touched me. And then I had to reach for the Kleenex.

There's always gonna be another mountain. I'm always gonna wanna make it move.

Always gonna be a uphill battle, sometimes I'm gonna have to lose.