BCS just keeps dirty laundry on spin cycle

Know what the BCS is doing in response to fans, senators and presidents who are screaming for a college football playoff?

They're hiring a new boss and PR man. Instead of fixing the problem, they're recruiting suits to spin on it.

Bill Hancock will become the BSC's official full-time executive director, replacing a hot windbag named John Swofford, and Ari Fleisher will be hired to prop up the BCS's image.

Hancock and Fleischer will be the new official dispensers of BCS crapola. It will be their jobs to convince the public that red is green, cold is hot and up is down.

They're going to sell the BCS to us as the best thing since TiVo. It's analogous to tobacco execs telling us cigarettes won't harm your health; it's the AAU telling us that amateurism is best for starving athletes; it's the IOC and Utah Legislature telling us gifts don't influence their judgment.

Hancock and Fleischer will try to convince us that a system that virtually eliminates half the field from title contention before the season begins, and automatically sends winners of select conferences to BCS bowls no matter their ranking or record, is fair and best. These guys better be good. They're selling what nobody is buying, except a few BCS fat cats.

Fleischer is the former press secretary under George W. Bush. Wait, can that be right? Isn't this like hiring Mickey Rourke to class up your wardrobe?

Fleischer quit Bush to start Ari Fleischer Communications, which provides advice on how to deal with the media. So now the media will be "handled," like pets.

Hancock won't take over until next year, but he's already hitting the campaign trail. The new boss did a radio interview last week with ESPN's Dan Patrick. Here's what we learned: This guy actually believes all that nonsense coming out of his mouth about the BCS. Perhaps he subscribes to George Constanza's philosophy — "It's not a lie if you believe it."

When asked by Patrick to describe his job, Hancock said, "Educate people about the benefits of the system we have on a day-to-day basis. That's the most important thing, just make sure it keeps moving forward and celebrate this game."

Hooray, Bill!

Hancock says a playoff system is bad because then student-athletes couldn't go to the beach.

Huh?