Speed has never been BYU's game

So what do you blame for BYU's embarrassing, lopsided losses?

That's what fans and media have been trying to decide in the wake of the Cougars' 38-7 loss to TCU two weeks ago, which followed a 54-28 loss to Florida State a couple weeks prior. During the ensuing bye week, the Cougars underwent more unwanted analysis than John Hinckley Jr.

Their shortcomings have become the subject of blogs and newspapers and talk shows and water cooler chat. You've heard the talk: Too slow. Can't recruit enough blue-chip athletes. Too slow. The Honor Code challenges. Too slow. Coach isn't emotional enough. Too slow.

Just one question: This is news?

Is this 2009 — or did we wake up in the middle of 1988?

BYU has been charged with the above shortcomings since, oh, about World War II.

Too slow? What are they going to spring on us next — that the government is running a deficit?

They were slow during the 11-1 season in 1980, with Jim McMahon under center.

They were slow during the 13-1 season in 1983, with Steve Young at quarterback.

They were slow when they won the national championship in 1984 and went on to win 25 consecutive games.

They were slow when Ty Detmer beat Miami and won the Heisman.

They were slow when they won 14 of 15 games, including the Cotton Bowl, in 1996.

They were slow when they won back-to-back conference championships and went unbeaten in conference play during Bronco Mendenhall's first two years as head coach.

They were slow when they beat Oklahoma a few weeks ago.

They're slower than the U.S. mail. Slower than Christmas Eve. Slower than Congress in a non-election year. The Jamaican track team, they're not.

They were slow years ago, they're slow now, they'll be slow in the future.

"It's no different than it's ever been around here," says LaVell Edwards, who should know. He heard all of the above when he was coaching the Cougars for three decades. "Speed has always been an issue," he says. "It's not the first time we've had trouble with those (fast) teams, nor will it be the last. I remember those high-scoring games we had with San Diego State — we just had to keep scoring."