Halloween hater? Just leave candy

Dear Annie: I find trick-or-treating annoying. I was raised in a religious group that didn't celebrate Halloween. My mother hated having to answer the door constantly and took out her anger on me. I once suggested we stop opening the door or put up a sign saying, "No Trick-or-Treating here, please," but she wouldn't. I think she was afraid they'd throw eggs.

My brother and I still find it irritating. I don't want my doorbell ringing all night. I don't want to get up and open the door over and over. I'm sure I'm not the only one. Think of those who are disabled or have just brought home a new baby or are caring for a sick child. Answering the door all evening is an unwanted imposition. I also resent these kids coming onto my property asking for candy. I think it's just plain wrong.

What can I do to keep them away? I don't want them to graffiti my property or toilet-paper my trees. I can grab them if they do, but if the police are busy, they might not come, and then I'd be stuck with the kids indefinitely.

Could you put up some kind of warning in your column asking parents not to let their kids trick-or-treat unless they know the homeowner?

— Elizabeth, N.J.

Dear N.J.: It's too bad you can't enjoy greeting children with a smile and brightening their day once a year. Most parents supervise their kids and prefer they stay within familiar territory. And most kids will skip unwelcoming homes where the lights are off or the treat is a breath mint.

But if you are concerned about becoming the neighborhood curmudgeon, put out a generous basket of candy on your front steps with a big sign saying, "Please don't ring bell. Take a piece of candy. Happy Halloween." Refill it once or twice at your leisure. When the basket is empty, the kids will know the cupboard is bare.

Dear Annie: I love my boyfriend. He's a superb partner. He is, however, the laid-back type or, depending on how you look at it, just plain lazy.

Since I am a bit high-strung, I appreciate how easygoing he is, but when it comes to our finances, I am bothered by his lack of get-up-and-go.

I have always made the bulk of our income. He thinks that we should share our finances and consult each other before major purchases (not unreasonable, I know), but I'm not sure this is fair, since the "sharing" is always from my pocket to his. His employers love him, but they've recently cut his hours for economic reasons.

Although he says he's looking for additional work, he isn't looking very hard. He no longer makes enough to cover his half of the bills.