Rock On

Make-believe world

Comedian Ray Romano is set to star in the second season of the Golf Channel reality show "The Haney Project."

In the show, he gets tips from legendary golf coach Hank Haney.

Romano has already starred on "Everybody Loves Raymond," pretending he's a sports writer. Now he's pretending to be a golfer.

Still, Rock On isn't about to be critical.

He gets to spend every Tuesday pretending he's a comedian.

In the game

They're bowed but not broken.

Utah and BYU players insisted after their losses last weekend that their main goals, like winning the MWC, are still attainable.

Rock On doesn't want to sound skeptical, but isn't that a bit like saying your love life is right on track, immediately following a breakup with Cameron Diaz?

Looking for love

News reports say a 107-year-old woman in Malaysia is looking for her 23rd husband.

Bobby Bowden and Joe Paterno were allegedly under consideration but turned her down, saying they were already married to football.

Come on down

Brad Dickson, Omaha World-Herald, on Bob Barker defeating Chavo Guerrero on "Monday Night Raw": "Guerrero said it was the second-toughest loss of his career, right after the time Wink Martindale got him with a claw hold."

Takedown

World Wrestling Entertainment CEO Linda McMahon plans to run for the U.S. Senate seat in Connecticut, as a Republican.

Sources say if she wins, her first item of business will be to apply a guillotine choke to Nancy Pelosi.

In the swim

Journalist Chuck Shepherd notes that in July, a county pool in Essex, England, banned swimmers from doing "lengths" in favor of "widths," to reduce drowning risk.

That must make for some awfully short laps.

If that had been initiated 20 years earlier, Michael Phelps might have ended up being the world record holder in the 12-meter individual medley.

Fraud alert

First came the news last month that Louisville coach Rick Pitino had after-hours relations with a woman in a restaurant. Then came the report that Kentucky coach John Calipari's former team, Memphis, had been stripped of its appearance in the 2008 national title game, due to NCAA violations.

What's the similarity, beyond the fact both are currently coaches in Kentucky?

None, really, except they're both cheaters of one sort or another.

Yes, dear

Cam Hutchinson of the Saskatoon StarPhoenix says the average man tells 126,000 lies in his lifetime.

He explains: "The average drops to 25,000 if you exclude Roger Clemens."

e-mail: rock@desnews.com