Rock on ...

Mack mistakes

Hawaii football coach Greg McMackin caused an uproar last week when he used an anti-gay term to describe Notre Dame's Haka dance. McMackin was suspended for 30 days without pay.

If memory serves, Hawaii lost to Notre Dame 49-21 in the Hawaii Bowl, which makes you wonder which shows worse judgment — making patently offensive remarks or mocking a team that beat you by 28 points.

A real homer

Manchester (N.H.) Union-Leader sports reporter Kevin Provencher was arrested last week on charges of running a prostitution ring in two states and Canada.

Prosecutors say he arranged meetings on the Internet between prostitutes and clients and received half the proceeds.

I'm not sure what he was thinking, but it certainly gives new meaning to the phrase "pimping for the home team."

Old technology

Engineers in Japan have created a robotic baseball pitcher that throws strikes 90 percent of the time and a robotic batter that hits 100 percent of anything thrown in the strike zone.

Yeah, well, here in America we already invented that. It's called Greg Maddux and Albert Pujols.

Underneath it all

UCLA's "Undie Run" has been axed by school officials, saying it was a safety concern.

The event, staged three times a year to relieve the stress of finals, had grown to as many as 10,000 participants, who ran a race in their skivvies.

But for those who can't live without running in their undies, there's still hope. It's just 31 days until the debut of the Lingerie Football League.

Survivor

Hulk Hogan Fan Appreciation Day was held in Bridgeview, Ill., recently, honoring the man, the legend.

What there actually is to appreciate about the Hulkster is debatable, except this: He may be the only person ever to ingest that many 'roids and do that much tanning and live to tell.

Missed calling

Former NFL running back Marshall Faulk landed a hole in one three weeks ago playing at the American Century Championship. It came on the par-3, No. 17 at Edgewood Tahoe Golf Course. The ace was his sixth.

Tell us again: Why did Faulk choose football and John Daly choose golf, instead of the other way around?

The big heist

Now this is low.

Maybe not O.J. low, but still.

Sharon Schumaier of Indio, Calif., is facing a felony embezzlement investigation on suspicion she stole over $100,000 from the local AYSO. Investigators believe the former youth soccer commissioner could have been defrauding the organization for 21/2 years.

In a related story, the AYSO has been charged with defrauding millions of parents into thinking soccer would eventually become America's No. 1 sport.

e-mail: rock@desnews.com