A few suggested changes to the Utah Constitution

In addition to terrible economic challenges, many states are confronting crises preventing basic operations of government. Momentum is growing — especially in California and New York — to restructure state political systems through constitutional conventions.

In Utah, if we stretch things a bit, we could say we face a "mini-constitutional crisis." Gov. Jon Huntsman Jr. has gone deep undercover in preparation for his Senate confirmation hearing as ambassador to China. In the meantime, Lt. Gov. Gary Herbert is doing his best to provide leadership but lacks constitutional authority until Huntsman resigns.

So, following Rahm Emanuel's counsel to "never waste a good crisis" (especially one carefully contrived), we must rise to the occasion of this impending calamity, hold a constitutional convention, and revise the Utah State Constitution with much-needed changes to benefit our society and community. Your columnists humbly offer the following improvements to our guiding charter:

Pignanelli: Include in the oath of office for governor an additional sentence: "I further promise and swear that I shall not consider, contemplate or dream of higher office in the federal government — whether appointed or elected — while serving as governor of the state."

Webb: Append at the end of Frank's amendment a statement in parentheses that reads: "(unless I turn out to be a really lousy governor)."

Pignanelli: Include in the oath of office for legislators the additional sentence: "I understand that I am a mere mortal and appreciate that two other branches of government exist."

Webb: Require that all tie votes in legislative committees be resolved by break-dancing contests.

Pignanelli: Vacant lands on Fremont Island and the salt flats shall be made available to Utah parents desirous of building structures to warehouse Utah teenagers for an indeterminate length of time.

Webb: Include in the Constitution's general provisions: "The state's top five high school football players each year shall sign up to play for Brigham Young University."

Pignanelli: The Department of Commerce shall not license or permit more than three new "multilevel marketing" operations per year, and no more than one multilevel operation permitted each year that sells and distributes a beverage extracted from some bizarre root or plant from an exotic location.