Is your child a spoiled brat?

The odds are good that nobody will call your child a spoiled brat. But someone might be thinking it.

Even the best-intentioned parents can have trouble telling a child "no" or not giving in to a well-staged tantrum.

Today, it's hard to imagine a time when children were "seen and not heard" and advice such as "spare the rod and spoil the child" was standard in child-rearing.

Some people now consider spanking children or scolding them in public as child abuse.

Indeed, it was a growing recognition of genuine child abuse in recent decades that led to a push for child protection and children's rights.

But has the pendulum swung too far?

"Parenting strategies changed quite a bit, from strict to almost lax," said Melanie Nelson, a child psychologist at the University of Oklahoma.

So, is society to blame for changing the rules? Or are the parents to blame for giving in to children who demand everything "right now"?

Elaine Fantle Shimberg, author of several books including "Blending Families" and "The Complete Single Father," says parents not only indulge their children but set the example.

"The kids who want what they want now are only following their parents who buy a flat-screen TV bigger than their neighbor's, a new car, bigger house, multiple handbags and shoes, and so on," Shimberg said.

"These parents have demonstrated that you don't have to wait regardless if you can pay for it or not, and immediate gratification is king."

If immediate gratification is king, then a sense of entitlement runs a close second.

In a world of quick fixes and instant pleasure, children with entitlement issues are everywhere -- making demands at the grocery store, bickering at birthday parties and setting their own rules with Mom and Dad, said Karen Deerwester, author of "The Entitlement-Free Child: Positive Parenting Solutions for Raising Confident and Respectful Kids."

But how do you combat this problem while building your child's confidence and self-esteem?

Simply put, parents can set limits.

"Kids need limits, and they appreciate having them," Nelson said. "Maybe not in the moment, but, all in all, they feel a lot safer and more secure if they have limits in their homes and they know where those boundaries are."

Many well-intended parents give their children too much, says Suzy Martyn, author of "Enjoying the Ride: Tools, Tips and Inspiration for the Most Common Parenting Challenges."

Some parents believe that by giving their children all they want, they're making up for what they didn't have as children themselves. Thus, they assume their children will be happier. But Martyn says the opposite is true.