"That's it," Emma proclaimed proudly. "I told you it wouldn't be that expensive." We added it up together. The grand total: $201.

Emma was very surprised to see that she was $101 over budget.

"Let's take another look at the list," I suggested. What, I asked, was most important to her? She really wanted the Barbie cake, but she decided that we could supplement it with homemade cupcakes for $3 instead of buying a second cake.

Then she crossed the pinata and the pizza off the list. The guests would be so busy swimming, they probably wouldn't even miss either of them. We found some art sets on clearance for a dollar each to go in the goodie bags. By working together, we were able to bring the total down to under $100.

The party was a great success, and so was the idea of sticking to a budget. Once they were required to toe the bottom line, Emma and Jacob became savvy shoppers. I no longer had to be the meanie who said, "No, you can't have the $70 cake shaped like a train." I could simply point out that buying that cake would leave just $30 for all of their other party goodies, and they would quickly rethink their plans.

My children have come to enjoy working within their birthday budgets. It gives them more control over the planning of their parties and helps them to decide what's truly important. Jacob and Daniel have even combined their parties some years to maximize their dollars (see the box below). I'm now looking forward to the day when our newest arrival, 2-year-old Samuel, has enough birthdays behind him to start planning his own parties — and learning to budget for them too.

The author shares some tips for helping birthday budgeters get the most for their dollar.

1. Shop at a dollar store, where price comparisons are simple. Kids can decide whether to buy three packs of eight "character" cups or one pack of 50 plain cups.

2. If siblings want to have a combined party (our two older boys have birthdays three weeks apart and some of the same friends), they get a budget of $150.

3. Invest in a fun cake mold. I bought a car-shaped one that can be decorated for a boy or girl, and it makes my kids feel that they're getting a special cake.Pauline Childs lives with her family in Crescent Springs, Kentucky.

Distributed by McClatchy-Tribune Information Services.