Here' something I noticed while staying in a motel for a week last month. …
Every time the maids did up my room they folded the end of the toilet paper into a neat little point.
This happened day after day. I'd drag myself back to the motel room after another intense conference workshop and discover (ta da!) that my toilet paper was all done up again — just like a present on Christmas morning.
I tried to imagine how this folding business went down: After scrubbing and swishing and bedmaking and vacuuming, did my maids turn to each other and say, "NOW HERE'S THE PART WHERE WE REALLY BRING IT"?
And then did they fold my toilet paper, do a victory dance, give each other high fives, pat each other on the rears, and trot out of the room chanting, "We're No. 1! We're No. 1!"
Anyway. Whatever. Here's my question: How am I supposed to feel about all this extra effort expended on my behalf?
Is pointy toilet paper supposed to make me feel like I'm staying at the Ritz?
Not that I've ever personally stayed at the Ritz. Our family always stayed in Motel 6 when I was growing up and that was GREAT because what could be better than flopping down on a Magic Fingers (kids, ask your parents) bed after a long, long day of fighting with your brothers in the backseat of a station wagon? That didn't have air conditioning?
As you drove on I-80 across the Nevada desert to San Francisco where your dad's friend who turned into a dentist did your teeth for free on weekends?
(Incidentally, John Houghtailing, the inventor of Magic Fingers, died last month in Florida from complications of a fall at the age of 92. WHO KNEW?)
But still. I've seen movies about the Ritz. Male guests wear top hats and tails. Women wear beaded gowns and gardenias in their hair. Together they drink champagne and dance all night and laugh ha ha ha ha ha ha ha at witty jokes and completely REFUSE to use toilet paper unless it's been folded into a perfect point because — hello — they're just way too good to use a blunt edge like the rest of us.
Maybe that's why the maids bothered. It was their little way of saying to guests (like me) that yeah, we know you're staying here in our humble motel where the only ice buckets available are the ones you fill for yourself.
But still!7 comments on this story
WE personally think you're good enough to stay at the Ritz!
Viewed this way, FOLDED TOILET PAPER = CRAZY ENHANCED GUEST SELF-ESTEEM.
And, seriously, how great is that?
Life is full of experiences large and small that can leave you feeling like you don't matter much, so I'm all for anything that helps you lift your chin a little higher, that gives you the kind of quiet confidence that comes from knowing you are someone who could totally stay at the Ritz.
So thank you, Housekeeping Staff!
You guys rocked!