'American Idol' will be more of same

How can we miss you if you won't go away?

This week's least surprising TV news comes in the form of (still unconfirmed) reports that all four judges will return next season on "American Idol." Even Paula Abdul, who had been making noises about not coming back.

Of course, in a surprising bit of honesty, she had also admitted on the "Late Show With David Letterman" that she was making those noises because she was negotiating a new contract.

Duh.

Abdul has exhibited all sorts of, um, unusual behavior during the eight years "Idol" has been on the air, but this wasn't an example of that. She's just the latest in a long line of TV stars who threaten to leave a show in order to negotiate a new contract.

You'd hardly think this would put her in a particularly strong negotiating position, however. It's difficult to imagine that the show couldn't and wouldn't go on without her.

At the same time, it's difficult to imagine that Abdul would have much of a career without "Idol."

Ah, well.

If the reports turn out to be true, Kara DioGuardi will also be back. Which means that there will still be at least one too many judges on the show next season.

What with all the yacking Abdul, DioGuardi, Simon Cowell and Randy Jackson were doing, the show had a tendency to run long this past season.

There's an answer to this problem that's both beautifully simple and utterly impossible. If there were some way to convince the judges that the show isn't about them, it's about the contestants, "American Idol" would not only run more smoothly but it would be a lot more fun to watch.

But, given the egos involved, that's never going to happen.

LIFE ISN'T FAIR: Abdul has endured plenty of criticism for her, um, unusual behavior over the years. And she's got nobody to blame but herself.

(Well, maybe she could blame Cowell a bit. He does tend to goad her into some of her on-air oddness.)

But isn't it sort of interesting that "So You Think You Can Dance" judge Mary Murphy doesn't catch one-tenth of the flack for her on-air behavior. And Murphy's on-air behavior is, week in and week out, a lot crazier.

I like Murphy. I really do. I've interviewed her, and she's truly charming in person.