Readers tell their funny stories

Mormon Times

Published: Tuesday, June 9 2009 12:00 a.m. MDT

Submitted by Carolyn Ipson, Sandy, Utah

In trying to remember my days as a young man in the priesthood, there is one moment I will always recall vividly. It was back in 1938. Now, for some of you that seems like a long time ago, but for me it was just yesterday.

I was a young deacon in the South Morgan Ward in Morgan. We had a nice stone chapel with wood floors, but no carpeting, just a nice varnished finish. The raised dais, where the organ stood, had the same flooring.

One Sunday I was given the assignment to pass the sacrament to those on the stand. As I was passing the water to the organist, I slipped on the recently waxed, varnished floor and fell flat.

Now this wouldn't have been such a great problem, except that in those days the sacrament cups were glass. When glass falls upon hardwood floors, it tends to break. Further, this young deacon was in front of the whole congregation and it was deathly quiet ... that is until I came along.

When glass quit falling and breaking, and the metal tray quit bouncing, a very embarrassed young man dragged himself to his feet and started to gather the remnants of his performance. A couple members of the bishopric came to my aid and I was able to finish my passing assignment.

Not long after this, either as a result of my experience or that of others, the church sent out notices to all custodians that they were not to wax the floors with their usual slippery wax, but to use a new non-slippery form.

Submitted by Lamar Burnett, Orem, Utah

I was recently washing dishes in a meetinghouse kitchen when my niece's 4-year-old daughter, Millie, asked me what we were doing.

"We're cleaning up the dishes so we won't leave a mess."


"Because when we use Jesus' house, we need to leave it nice and clean."


"Because it wouldn't be polite to go to someone's house and make a big mess and then leave without cleaning it up, would it? Did you know that the church is Jesus' house?"

She studied me for a moment, wondering if I was teasing, but finally decided I was serious.

"I didn't know this was Jesus' house," she marveled. "Who locks the doors when we go home?"Submitted by Beth Stephenson, Edmond, Okla.

My daughter, Rachel Williams, is blessed with a wonderful 5-year-old son who had a heart transplant when he was a few months old. From time to time Dallin has perfectly exemplified the scripture found in 3 Nephi 26:14 that says the children "did speak unto their fathers great and marvelous things."

One Sunday, some Melchizedek Priesthood holders were blessing the sacrament in Dallin's ward. In response to a deep-voiced sacrament prayer and too short to see the sacrament table, Dallin whispered in his dad's ear, "Dad, was that Jesus saying the prayer?" His dad whispered back, "No" A half a minute later, and

deep in thought, Dallin asked in a more serious tone, "Was it Heavenly Father?"

Out of the mouth of babes.

Submitted by Kevan Blair, South Jordan, Utah

Reported to have happened in an older church building in a Salt Lake stake:

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