Rock on

You've got mail

I got a letter last week that said on the envelope, "From the Desk of LaVell Edwards."

It listed his return address as 3216 North University Ave. in Provo, which sounded fairly close to LaVell Edwards Stadium.

Hmmmm. Intriguing.

Then I noticed the part that said "PERSONAL INVITATION: Brad Rock or Current Resident."

Turned out it was an ad for an audiology clinic. And it wasn't personal in any way.

On the bright side, it did offer a glimpse into those mass recruiting letters that prep athletes receive: "ATTENTION BLUE CHIP HIGH SCHOOL ATHLETE — OR CURRENT RESIDENT."

All-purpose

Masha Kirilenko is releasing a pop single in the U.S. this month and an album in the fall.

She had a No. 1 hit in Russia in 2001 and apparently is going all-out to become a star here, too.

She has a boutique at Gateway, is heavily involved in charities and is raising a family. Before marrying Andrei, she worked with a film crew, hosted a TV show, managed a band, worked in banking and started a sports marketing firm.

So she does a little bit of everything, just like A.K. himself.

Which leaves just one question: How come the Jazz haven't signed her to play 2-guard?

Going ... gone

If you thought it was odd when the NHL moved to Versus, now the Stanley Cup Finals are getting moved around by NBC in favor of Conan O'Brien and a reality show called "I'm a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here!"

Which brings to mind an idea for another nifty TV reality show.

They could call it "I'm a Jazz Free Agent, Get Me Out of Here!"

Dead giveaway

Cam Hutchinson, of the Saskatoon StarPhoenix, published Derek Wilkens' top five signs your star player is taking female fertility drugs: "5. Refuses to go out with teammates, saying he is nesting; 4. Signs an endorsement deal with a sports bra manufacturer; 3. Hires Martha Stewart to redecorate his locker; 2. Complains about water retention; 1. Constantly asking teammates if the uniform makes his butt look big."

Marketing Manny

Ogden Raptors CEO Dave Baggott is reportedly trying to get the Dodgers to send Manny Ramirez to rehab in Ogden, following his suspension.

Baggott told the Standard-Examiner he's not endorsing Ramirez's actions. But a star is a star. And a marketing bonanza is a marketing bonanza.

Just a suggestion: As long as they're hosting suspected 'roid users, why not bring in Jose Canseco for some kick-boxing?

e-mail: rock@desnews.com