Shell-shocked, and mad enough to spit about it
What kind of things should one get ticked off about?
Unfairness of the BCS? Rising ticket prices of sporting events? More trash fish in our beloved lakes? Rigged draws for big hunts?
Sitting here fretting over the list, some carry more weight than others.
There are plenty of things to rank on a list, some are more meaningful, a few more global or national than others.
Some are more personal.
What ticks me off is hitting a nice approach shot to a plush green and, when I go to mark my ball, I find a trail of sunflower seeds scattered on my putting line.
Then, the seed shells are on the next green. Then the next, and so on.
Uggggghhhh.
I try to picture in my mind the kind of person who would do this. What would they look like? What kind of clothing do they wear, what kind of clubs do they carry, what is their age? Are they golfing solo, or do they have friends witnessing the seed dump?
Sure, I thought Michael Vick deserved jail time for operating a dog-fighting ring. Cruelty to animals is cowardly, but in sports, so are all those millionaire stars who punch wives and girlfriends but never pay the legal price.
Vick? He's not my QB and the dogs are now well-loved in Kanab.
RSL's road record is dismal, if not incredible. It's sad, a mystery and a real concern.
But I don't buy soccer tickets.
Sunflower seeds on a golf course? Can you imagine? These pesky shells that line the spit-entrenched bottom of baseball dugouts might hide their not-so-easy decomposing shells in a fairway, but on a green, where an old ball mark can easily change the line of an eagle or birdie putt?
Idiocy. Classlessness.
Cracking and spitting seeds on a golf green is a nasty, senseless, dumb act by a first-class nincompoop, who'd best be served licking the grooves off irons of the rest of the players on the course for punishment. Jackass, sap and doofus are labels too kind for this kind of dork.
Oh, there are worries over the Utah Jazz dabbling with the luxury tax to keep key elements of their team together.
But it's not my money.
I worried a little when the face of the Romulan terrorist in the new Star Trek movie, Nero (Eric Bana), reminded me a lot of Carlos Boozer. Maybe a subconscious thing, I dunno. But the thought soon passed.
Neither is my enemy, nor my issue.
But a seed-spitter roaming around on a golf green? The idea of somebody cracking and lip-dropping a moist-with-saliva, possible swine-flu-germ-infested shell on an otherwise groomed, smooth green for somebody else to pick up and dispose of?
Disgusting.
Recent comments
The worst on that list is rsl's road record. It's truly pathetic how...
a big fat person | May 21, 2009 at 1:01 p.m.
RSL's road record is indeed horrible.
Anonymous | May 21, 2009 at 12:51 p.m.
I didn't think Dick Harmon could write any piece that wasn't BYU...
Y lover | May 21, 2009 at 9:43 a.m.
- Sands China stock tumbles in debut 9:21 a.m.
- Vegas pinning hopes on CityCenter 9:20 a.m.
- Saab CEO courting buyers in Detroit 9:19 a.m.
- Court won't disturb $82M award 9:18 a.m.
- Rumor: Papers paid to shun Google 9:17 a.m.
- Gov't pressures mortgage industry 9:15 a.m.
- Salvation Army kettle stolen 9:05 a.m.
- Charges filed in ATM theft 9:05 a.m.
- Army teams nurture mental health 9:04 a.m.
- Man suspected of killing family 9:04 a.m.
- Hall mouths off about hate of Utah
- Y. student vanished in China
- Max Hall issues apology
- Hall's pain reflects self-betrayal
- BYU is champion of the state
- Boy shot following traffic stop
- Cougars beat Utes in overtime
- Cougs begin bowl preparations
- Marriage definitions vary widely
- Utes won't respond to Hall
- Hall mouths off about hate of Utah
877 - Cougars beat Utes in overtime
477 - Max Hall issues apology
263 - Hall's pain reflects self-betrayal
140 - BYU is champion of the state
138 - Man trapped in Nutty Putty cave dies
119 - Cave to be sealed with body inside
116 - Rivalry Week is highly profane
90 - Hall's legacy measured today
80 - Utes fall to Seattle U. at home
65
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