A suave hair product commercial on TV declares, "89 percent of moms admit they've let themselves go."

The commercial features a pretty brunette mom who quickly descends into stay-at-home mom frumpiness as she adds on kids, pounds and hair that is no doubt Suave-product free.

Happily, in the end the mother finds Suave and she is suddenly put back together in a cocktail dress with bouncy, lustrous hair and well-behaved children clinging to her legs.

The commercial concludes, "100 percent of moms can get themselves back."

Hooray! All my problems are solved. Who knew the answer to my muffin top, my stretch marks, my lack of time, my self-doubts, my split ends and my daughter's willful disobedience could be found in a bottle of shampoo?

But the real reason this commercial makes me chuckle is because the people at Suave are more profound than they probably even know.

Yes, moms let themselves go physically when they have kids, but the more important transformation is that they have to let themselves go in every aspect of their lives.

Suddenly, you're not the main character in your life anymore. Instead, a little being that you didn't even know months before takes center stage in your life and you have to let go of your ego, your hang-ups and the limelight.

You have to let yourself go.

Before I had my daughter, for example, I was the star in my life.

Now, my 19-month-old daughter gets top billing, and I am relegated to a supporting role. Some days, I feel like I'm more like the key grip — you know, the weird position that is always last on the credits that no one really cares about or even knows what it is.

Yes, that's me — key grip.

I first realized I had been bumped from the marquee of my life in the delivery room. While I was in labor, I had friends, family, doctors and strangers wandering in off the streets to encourage me and tell me how wonderful I was. As soon as that little baby popped out, I was on my own — literally.

All I could see was the backs of my former cheering section as they cooed over the baby. I vaguely remember asking for a sandwich and everyone ignoring me.

I had to let myself go.

I also have to let go every day in many small ways. I no longer order what I want at restaurants, only what is easy to cut into pieces for my daughter.

In stores, I beeline for the kids section and haven't stepped foot in the adult section of the shoe store in two years.

Even exercising is now all about my daughter as she sits on my stomach while I do sit-ups as if it's a ride I invented for her enjoyment.

My mother used to always quote the line, "A mother is a person who seeing there are only four pieces of pie for five people, promptly announces she never did care for pie."

She's a woman who has learned to let herself go.

Yet, unlike the happy — albeit ridiculous — end of the Suave commercial where 100 percent of moms get themselves back, I don't think I ever will.

And maybe that's not so bad.

After all, being the key grip to my little leading lady is way better than even my best day being the star.

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Erin Stewart's blog, Just4Mom, can be found Tuesdays and Thursdays at deseretnews.com. E-mail: estewart@desnews.com