From Deseret News archives:

Obamas, I've got the perfect recycled puppy for you

Published: Tuesday, Nov. 11, 2008 12:39 a.m. MST
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Ever since President-elect Obama told his daughters, Malia and Sasha, they could have a puppy, my husband's been waging a quiet effort to nominate our golden retriever Boomer. Today, I'm rolling out the public campaign.

OK, so Boomer's not exactly a puppy. He's 5 years old and a little white around the muzzle. But if we don't get into a silly exercise of counting in dog years, he's still younger than Sasha.

Michelle, can we talk? Boomer is house-trained. You know what can happen to dogs that have accidents in the White House. You may recall that President Reagan's dog, Grits, was sent packing for his indescretions.

House-training is not for whimps. My exhaustion from house-training a puppy was roughly the same as the first few weeks after childbirth. My husband and I have house-trained two puppies in 20 years of marriage. Trust me, Michelle, you don't want to go there.

Here's another plus. Boomer knows how to fetch. He'd chase a tennis ball all day if we were game enough to keep throwing it. Having owned dogs that fetch and those that couldn't have cared less, the fetchers are a whole lot more fun. (I mean if your dog doesn't fetch, he or she may as well be a cat.)

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Here's another bonus: He loves children. Loves, loves, loves them. I'll never forget the time my daughter was hosting a slumber party and Boomer planted himself in the middle of the circle of their sleeping bags. We understand your girls are big on sleepovers. So is he.

Michelle, you once said you would like to adopt a rescue dog. It so happens Boomer came from a rescue. In fact, he's a repeat customer. We're his fourth home. He's the poster child for dog rescue. Imagine the headlines: "Obamas rescue five-time 'loser' " or "Boomer Obama, First Pet," or "Recycled retriever to occupy the White House."

Since you will be entertaining a good deal in the White House, know that Boomer loves to be petted. In fact, he insists on it. In short doses, it may help to relieve your stress. But Boomer doesn't know when to say when.

Anyone who has a dog knows that dogs have, well, unusual habits. To the unaccustomed they may seem ill-mannered or anti-social. In the interest of disclosure you should know that Boomer has a few of those quirks.

Boomer's not exactly selective about what he eats. He'll eat anything. I mean anything.

He's been known to sniff just about anything or anybody who enters our home. This could be the stuff of an international incident should he sniff the leader of another nation in an unmentionable place. On second thought, you might want to corral him when company calls. I'm sure he'd be happy to chill out on one of the girls' beds.

Recent comments

One small problem with your offer... Golden's aren't hypoallergenic...

Steve | Nov. 12, 2008 at 4:02 p.m.

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