From Deseret News archives:

Can't buy me love — Define emotions, spiritual life before you declutter

Published: Tuesday, Aug. 19, 2008 12:13 a.m. MDT
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Nelson believes, "As you declutter, you will find your true self."

One of his hardest tasks was to go through the photos and letters of his deceased parents, Nelson admits. In his book he describes how he went into a trance and actually became the child he once was. He'd long been angry with his father but came to understand the man better through the process.

Eventually, he was able to get rid of about 30 percent of the memorabilia. And even more important, he says, he was able to file the remaining items where he could find them again.

We hold on to things because we feel not-good-enough, Nelson says. But if you want more love, you should volunteer at a nursing home. Or get a pet. In the end, he notes, our things can't love us.

Cluttering expert Mike Nelson offers some tips for those who want less clutter in their lives:

1. Be kind to yourself. You didn't get this way overnight, and you won't be decluttered in a day or a week or a month. But you will get better.

2. Start small. Make tiny, reachable goals. It is important, at first, to feel successful.

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3. You will probably never be completely decluttered. That's fine. You are who you are, and we clutterers like to have more possessions around us than others do.

4. Your goal is to have a home where you feel comfortable.

5. Clutter is an excess of abundance. Celebrate your abundance by sharing it.

6. Shoot the next person who tells you, "If you haven't seen it in six months, you don't need it." If you haven't seen it, how do you know you don't need it? By their reasoning, the tomb of Ramses the Great had no value.

7. Keep a decluttering diary. By keeping track of where you have been, you know where you want to go. Take before and after pictures.

8. Try decluttering in 15-minute increments. If you find you work better in longer sessions, do that.

9. Keep thinking small. A square foot is a lot to declutter in a session, at first.

10. Make spaces sacred after you have decluttered them. One sacred space at a time will grow to be a whole house. (Or nearly a whole house. You need to give yourself permission to clutter somewhere.)

11. If you love books, let them fly free. Donate them to a hospital or to a library book sale. If you really miss them, you can go to the library book sale and buy them back. (You can also hope that you will procrastinate and not get to the sale on time.)

12. Having a garage sale is likely going to be too much work and stress for you. Take some of your good stuff to a resale shop. If it doesn't sell, donate it.

Recent comments

I was going to print this article out. Just as I was about to push...

Barbara | Aug. 19, 2008 at 11:19 a.m.

I am at our summer home in Montana and this article inspires me to...

Ute Alum | Aug. 19, 2008 at 10:07 a.m.

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Photo illustration by John Clark, Deseret News

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