Will presidential hopefuls fight or have civil debates?

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In our home, we worked mightily at trying to teach our children the difference between the destruction and danger of "mean, fighting arguments" and the education and stimulation of passionate but thoughtful "debates."

Interestingly, we may be about to face a presidential general election where which of these two directions we take could affect our country for generations.

It's the same in a national campaign as it is in a household argument. If we take the low road, it can be deeply divisive and destructive, and if we take the high road, it can actually educate and unite.

Of course, Mitt Romney still has to secure the nomination, but a Romney-Obama general election could become one of two drastically different things:

1. A flash point of class warfare, pitting rich against poor; a bloody and negative free-for-all in which people take sides and attack each other — from the top of the ticket to the hostile and divided electorate.

2. A stimulating, educational debate between two principled and mutually respectful candidates who present sharply differing visions for this country with a tone that teaches voters both about more conservative free enterprise and about more progressive policies and gives all Americans a choice between thoughtful but different philosophies.

The first could literally push America over the cliff toward all-out class warfare, while the second could defuse dangerous animosities and bring this divided country together.

Which of these two we get may be determined within days of Romney becoming the presumptive nominee. If he attacks President Obama personally or uses 30-second sound-bite ads that oversimplify and distort the president's goals and record, and if President Obama "does likewise" by attacking Romney's tax returns and private equity background and portraying him as an "exploiter," then No. 1 will happen and will throw fuel on the embers of class warfare.

In this scenario, the whole campaign will deepen the divides in this country. In fact, the campaign itself could do more harm to America than the eventual winner could do good in his entire term.

On the other hand, if Romney's first ad after his acknowledgement as the Republican candidate is a clear, thoughtful, 30-minute documentary on who he is and on his vision for America, done with respect both for President Obama and the presidency and for the intelligence of the voting public, it could set a "high road" tone that the president would feel that he had to match.