On second thought

First Iowa said it might set its presidential primary for Jan. 3, then New Hampshire said it seriously is considering holding its primary on Dec. 6. I think Utah ought to trump everyone by holding one in November of this year, and by making it for the 2016 presidential race.

You know where this is heading, dont you? TV execs probably already are discussing a reality baby-contest show, where viewers pick the candidates for 2056.

The Postal Service has been running huge deficits with no end in sight, so its leaders have hit on a new strategy: increase the amount of junk mail. And they say Americas genius for business is fading.

Of course, this could be part of a larger strategy. With a surge in junk mail, people wont mind so much if the mail doesnt come every day and the local Post Office closes.

Presidential candidate Herman Cain got a lot of attention last week with his 9-9-9 tax plan. Jon Huntsman Jr. said Cains plan sounds like a pizza deal. If Cain, the former CEO of Godfathers, had such a deal, what would it be? Nine pizzas with nine toppings for $9? And this is supposed to cut the fat out of government?

Cain would add a 9 percent national sales tax on top of your local sales tax. He thinks this would be more than offset by reducing the income tax rate to a flat 9 percent, in a country where many of the lowest 50 percent of earners presently pays nothing after deductions and credits. If youre keeping score, this means your next Godfathers pizza just got 9 percent more expensive.

Is it just coincidence that in Germany, which has Europes strongest economy, this would sound like No-No-No?

So what was up with Michele Bachmann turning the 9-9-9 upside down and implying something devilish was going on? Does Cain need Christine ODonnell to reassure everyone hes not a witch?

Salt Lake City may outlaw excessive idling. When news of this hit, every worker in the city shot to attention, closed out eBay, stopped chatting on Facebook and got to work. Then they realized city officials were just talking about automobiles.

Jay Evensen is associate editor of the Deseret News editorial page. Follow him on Twitter @Jayevensen.