On second thought...

Some politicians say the economy is suffering from a sense of uncertainty, which keeps businesses from making long-term plans. So it was refreshing to see them pass a resolution last week keeping the government running for a few more minutes. You want certainty? You got it – at least until sometime after lunch.

The latest budget deal keeps the nation afloat until Nov. 18. That ought to keep our Chinese landlords from making those annoying collection calls for a while.

Supermarkets around the country have announced they are phasing out self-checkout stands. It seems one of you out there typed in the wrong code for bananas.

Seriously, wouldn't people rather listen to a pleasant disembodied, robotic voice than deal with a real live checker who might raise her eyebrows after ringing up your third jumbo bag of cheese-flavored jalapeño chocolate pretzels?

Democrats have threatened to sue the state over a political redistricting plan that changes Utah's form of government from a democratic republic to just Republican.

Republicans are countering that they haven't been unfair. After all, a few congressional districts have actual Democrats in them.

A company that wants to build a bridge across Utah Lake was victimized by a con artist back East who promised millions in venture capital. Apparently, it had something to do with buying the Brooklyn Bridge.

I think I've run into that guy on the streets of lower Manhattan. For an extra 10 grand, he would have thrown in some fertile swampland in Florida.

Provo City Councilman Steve Turley was so sure of his innocence against ethics charges that he resigned this week. That'll teach 'em.

The Onion, an online satirical newspaper, got in trouble this week for sending what it thought were funny Tweets about a shooting at the Capitol in Washington, involving members of Congress taking children as hostages. Capitol police were not amused. It's not that they lack a sense of humor. It's just that the joke wasn't so far-fetched. Remember, some criminals actually have higher approval ratings than members of Congress.