Things that make you go hmmm? in sports

Mister Know-It-All — a.k.a. the fabulous Mr. K — is back in our studio, as grumpy and curmudgeonly as ever. He's ready to take your sports questions. What's on your mind, if you'll forgive the overstatement.

QUESTION: What will LeBron James do if there is no NBA season?

MISTER K: He will make The Decision — to take his talents to writing a book called, "How to Ruin a Legacy Overnight," with a foreword by Brett Favre, an afterword by Tiger Woods and a preface co-written by Barry Bonds, Mark McGwire and Roger Clemens.

QUESTION: What was your reaction when Steelers linebacker James Harrison called NFL commissioner Roger Goodell, among other things, "a crook," "a devil," "stupid," "puppet" and "dictator."

MISTER K: A puppet AND a dictator? Memo to Harrison: Make up your mind. Or was he talking about Bud Selig?

QUESTION: The head of cycling's governing body said this week that a positive drug test or two at the Tour de France wouldn't necessarily be "a bad thing" because it would indicate that the drug tests are working. Is it just me, or is that crazy?

MISTER K: If International Cycling Union president Pat McQuaid were a surgeon he would say, "I hope some of my patients get sick so I can see if this medicine works." Consider it a sign of the times for cycling; McQuaid will probably get his wish.

QUESTION: What Top 20 college football programs are being investigated by the NCAA? I'm having trouble keeping track of them all.

MISTER K: A better question would be what Top 20 programs aren't under investigation. Let's see, there's Ohio State, North Carolina, Tennessee (Lane Kiffin: The Gift that keeps on giving), Georgia Tech, Georgia, Oregon, South Carolina, Florida, Alabama, West Virginia, Auburn and Boise State. Looks like the NCAA will need to open a branch office in the Deep South. Take the annual list of the Top 20 teams in the nation, cut it in half and you get a pretty good idea of the situation. More are sure to follow.

QUESTION: Speaking of college football, the BCS distributed $142.5 million of revenue from its five bowl games, with $115.2M (81 percent) going to the BCS conferences and the remaining $24M going to the five coalition conferences. I'm no math major, but that doesn't sound fair, does it?