Brad Rock: Rock On

Published: Monday, May 9 2011 9:47 p.m. MDT

RARE AIR

Ex-BYU tight end Chad Lewis is going to the top. Literally.

Lewis is among several former NFL personalities who plan to summit Africa's highest peak, Mount Kilimanjaro, to raise awareness for the Wounded Warrior Project.

The bad news: He might get altitude sickness. The good news: Next time an announcer starts rhapsodizing about teams climbing the summit or touching the clouds, Lewis can roll his eyes and say, "Yeah, been there, done that."

At 19,000 feet, as a matter of fact.

SCALING BACK

Following Real Salt Lake's April 27 CONCACAF loss to Monterrey, the club returned to MLS play by losing to the Portland Timbers. Overall, the team hasn't been playing especially well.

Now it has lost star player Javier Morales to injury.

Sources say RSL is considering a new theme for the rest of the season: "Yesterday, the World; Today, Hoping to Get Everyone to Practice."

OFF THE TOP

A Houston Astros fan is crying foul after winning a $927 coupon for free donuts, only to learn he owes $237 in taxes.

Which is a lot like the Bulls must feel after signing Carlos Boozer to that $80 million contract.

FRIENDS

Manchester United soccer player Darron Gibson is over, done, finished.

Not with the game; with Twitter.

After signing up for the social network, he closed his account 96 minutes later, thanks to a slew of insulting postings.

And those are the people that really like soccer.

HAPPY HOUR

Experts have always said people couldn't survive a blood alcohol level above 0.40, but according to the Star-Tribune newspaper, recent sobriety test results — including one at 0.72 — indicate otherwise.

One theory is that people are developing a greater tolerance for alcohol.

Which for some reason seems to tie in with being a Detroit Lions fan.

FINAL FRONTIER

A Russian biomedical expert says that despite the rumors, so far there has been no lovemaking in space.

Clearly, this man has never been to a party at Dennis Rodman's place.

email: rock@desnews.com

Twitter: therockmonster

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