Remembering Cooper with peace, not anger

OREM — There's a warm summer breeze blowing as two brothers play catch outside their Orem home. Nearby, another blond boy teases a bee buzzing around his swing set. If Cooper were here, he'd be gathering sticks or slurping down a blue Otter Pop, growing more tan by the minute. But today, his brothers play without him. Saturday marks one year since 4-year-old Cooper Kofford was run over in his driveway — a poignant day that has transformed the Kofford family, they say.

"I think (a tragedy like this) can ruin you or define you," says dad Quinn Kofford. "We've chosen to have it define us."

The Koffords were a close family before, but now, their hugs are more frequent.

They quarrel less and have a better appreciation of their LDS faith, which they say has provided immense comfort. Cooper's five siblings, ages 3 to 14, have matured in ways most children don't, says their mother, Jana Lynn Kofford.

"I'm not happy (Cooper's) gone," she says with tears in her eyes. "But there's a very strong feeling that the Lord was so much more in charge than we were. That doesn't heal my aching heart, but it helps me to know there is a bigger plan. And every day helps us understand more."

This year, July 31 needs to be filled with laughter and happiness in celebration of Cooper's life.

Wanting help staying cheerful, the Koffords organized a run in Cooper's honor with proceeds going to provide preschool scholarships for under-privileged children — the same preschool where Cooper learned to write his name.

So far more than 500 people have registered, a bigger turnout than the family ever imagined.

The choice of a run is ironic, Quinn points out with a smile, because they're not runners. As in, "I-only-run-from-the-bed-to-the-refrigerator" non-runners.

So, they welcome everyone — runners, walkers, bikers or scooter-riders because it's not really about the race. It's about remembering Cooper and thanking Orem police, firefighters and emergency medical services, Quinn says.

What could have been a horrific, scarring event for the Koffords instead became a peaceful, teaching moment, thanks to emergency responders' sensitivity, kindness and even reverence, Jana Lynn says.