Salt Lake to Chicago: Carlos Boozer's your enigma now

SALT LAKE CITY —

Hello, Chicago. Love your deep-dish pizza and hot dogs. In a way, we feel like we're old acquaintances. We did spend a lot of time together back in the day.

Because of that, we in Utah just wanted to give you a heads up on Carlos Boozer, the free agent you're adding to your roster. The man is going to tantalize you. We imagined him as the second coming of Karl Malone. But don't be fooled. He's far more complex than that.

Malone, you could read him like a movie marquee. When he was in a bad mood, feeling neglected or feeling happy, we all knew it.

Boozer just has so many layers.

And here's the thing: He'll never let you in. Five years from now, you won't know any more about him than you do today.

We Utahns never did figure him out, and it bothered us. We like plain speakers. That's why the late Larry H. Miller was such a popular owner — he never met a subject he wouldn't address. Jerry Sloan's not nearly as gregarious, but he's as plainspoken as a farmer. (Wait a minute, he is a farmer.) Even John Stockton's stony-faced determination made sense. He didn't talk much, but at least we knew his intentions.

Stockton was always ready to go, every single night.

Boozer was a vapor, a fleeting glance from the corner of the eye. Good guy, bad guy, All-Star, slacker. The most polarizing Jazz player since Adrian Dantley and probably the most disliked Jazz player ever. Greg Ostertag had detractors, but compared to Boozer it wasn't even close.

That's because expectations weren't high for Ostertag. Most Jazz fans just rolled their eyes when he screwed up. Boozer made fans angry, not so much for screwing up as for not showing up.

Like Boozer, Dantley alienated fans with his standoffish personality, but he arrived in the early days when the Jazz profoundly needed a star. And he always came ready to play. Boozer did, too, producing 20 points and 10 rebounds every night.

On the nights that he wasn't hurt.

On one end of the court.

It's the strangest thing. Boozer doesn't squabble with his coaches, fans or the press. You wonder if sometimes doing so would help him to let off steam. But it isn't going to happen. He's detached, distant, condescending. Ask a question, any question, and his favorite response is "We'll just have to wait and see what happens."