Childbirth means your life's forever changed

There comes a moment in every woman's pregnancy when she suddenly realizes that there is a human being inside of her that is going to barrel its way toward the light.

Sure, we know this reality somewhere in the back of our minds from the moment we take that first pregnancy test, but it never really hits until that last trimester and your well-worn copy of "What to Expect When You're Expecting" informs you that your baby weighs about 5 pounds and is 18 inches long. That little body is coming out whether you like it or not.

During my first pregnancy three years ago, this lightning bolt moment hit me while I was driving down I-15 after work. I called my husband in a panic to inform him of the groundbreaking news:

"I'm having a baby," I screamed.

"Yes, I know," he replied.

"No, I mean there's only one way out of this — I'm going to have a baby! I take it back. I take it back! I've changed my mind!"

Of course, there are really no takesies-backesies when it comes to childbirth.

The path is set and you have few options but to grin and bear it. Or in my case, hit the epidural early and hit it hard.

But this pregnancy, I'm a little more comfortable with the idea of delivering a baby. What I didn't expect, however, was a very different lightning bolt moment that hit me during a routine music class with my 3-year-old daughter, Nicole, last week.

She was marching around the room shaking some maraca eggs while I dragged my hugely pregnant body behind her. As I watched her laughing and dancing across the room, it hit me: I'm having another baby and my life with Nicole will never be the same.

It will no longer just be she and I at parks and outings and bedtime. This period of my life where I have one small child to care for and that's it will be over. I will have two kids. Nicole will be starting preschool in the fall.

My life is changing, and I'm going to miss this sweet period of my life. This sudden realization hit me harder than any epiphany about the impending pain of childbirth ever could.

Blame it on the hormones, but this thought struck me so unexpectedly that I started sobbing as I marched around the music room with the other moms and toddlers.

I know I looked ridiculous, but I've truly cherished these years with my daughter. It's hard to say goodbye to this era of my life.