It's OK to ask about salary when interviewing for a job

Dear Abby: My co-workers and I would like your opinion on the following question: Is it appropriate to ask about the salary during a job interview?

Half of us say, "Yes. When better to ask what the pay will be?" Others say, "No, it's in poor taste." What do you think? — All Bets Are In

Dear All: Of course the subject of salary should be discussed during a job interview. Usually, when an interview is nearing its end, the interviewer will ask, "Do you have any questions?" If the topics of salary and benefits haven't come up before then, it's perfectly acceptable to inquire about them.

Dear Abby: I am 35 years old and the mother of two children. The oldest is 4 and my little one just turned 1.

My mother-in-law had gastric bypass surgery two years ago. She lost a lot of weight and looks great, having gone from a size 16 to a size 4.

My problem is the comments she makes about my weight in the presence of others. For example, "Do you see that 'Cate' is so big-boned and I am so petite?" It hurts, and I don't know what to do about it. What can I say to her the next time she says something like that? — "Cate" in Oklahoma City

Dear "Cate": Don't wait for your mother-in-law to say something about your weight in front of others. Tell her clearly, in advance, that her comparisons are hurtful and you want them stopped immediately. And if she doesn't comply, the next time she does it, smile and say, "We can all see that you're petite and I'm not, but I'll always be younger."

Dear Abby: My husband, "Rick," and I have been married 20 years. He's a veteran who is completely disabled. We live in a very secluded area. The nearest town is 60 miles away, and I can't be gone long because of Rick's needs.

Abby, I'm lonely. My family lives in another state. Rick said years ago that we would move to where my family members are. But now he refuses because he doesn't want to leave his comfort zone.

Some days I am more down than others. Our home is on the market, but we won't be going far — just a bit closer to the town where Rick's family is. When I bring up the subject of missing my relatives, Rick gets angry so I don't say anything anymore. I long for my family — and for many other things as well. Could you share your feelings on this, please? — Nowhere in Montana

Dear Nowhere: Gladly. Because your husband refuses to move to where your family members are, keep your fingers crossed that it won't be too long before you find a buyer for your current home.

Do move closer to his family. At least then you won't be so isolated. And once you're closer to his family, THEY can look out for him while you schedule some visits to your family.

If you go a couple of times a year, it could make a big difference in your outlook.

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Write Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.