Status is no excuse for treating people with disdain

Back in high school when I transferred to a new school — a prestigious girls boarding school three hours away from home — I was treated horribly. It was especially true when I tried out for the field hockey team.

The girls were rude. I was ignored and made fun of. I couldn't believe it, and I almost quit the tryouts. But I stuck it out.

Yet, I wondered, was I unpopular because I didn't wear nice workout clothes? Or was it because I didn't add ribbons to them like the other girls? Was it because I didn't come from a wealthy family? Or because I didn't have the looks?

Or because I wasn't popular? How could I be unpopular, by the way, when I'd only been there a few weeks?

Or was it because I was from Watertown, N.Y, and not Cambridge, Mass., or Wilmington, Del., or one of the other "prestigious" Eastern cities.

I remember wracking my brain trying to figure out why I was treated the way I was.

I will never forget, though, the day the team list was posted on the gym door. I had made the team!

And, almost immediately, the girls who were mean to me wanted to be buddies. I was instantly accepted. It was if the rude behavior in tryouts never happened. No one apologized. It was as though I just dreamed it all.

But I knew I hadn't.

I will never forget how I felt, vowing not to treat others the way I was treated.

Fast forward to 2010. I was on an outing recently with adults I didn't know. And, you are not going to believe this — same things. Rude behavior. Ignored, excluded. Even made fun of.

The people I was with were all model-like. Yes, gorgeous and handsome. Popular. In shape. Well-known in their professions. Wealthy, nicely dressed. Even members of a church.

And, I did already say rude, right?

I couldn't believe it. Since when is anyone better than another? I don't care if you have a better title or car or hair or body or last name or heritage or home or degree. Or if you're more popular. You get the point.

But, perhaps, I needed this reminder to work even harder to make everyone count.

The third president of the United States and lead author of the Declaration of Independence, Thomas Jefferson, stated, "We hold these truths to be self-evident: that all men are created equal; that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable rights …"

I love the "that all men are created equal" part.

But, until that day, I've got a lot of work to do.

How about you?

Cynthia Kimball Humphreys is a professional speaker and trainer through her company Every1Counts, LLC. She writes a column for weeklies in southern Utah and is a southern Utah correspondent for the Deseret News. Her column, "GR8NESS," appears on deseretnews.com bi-weekly. e-mail: kimball@every1counts.net