Teen needs to relax to overcome dating shyness

Dear Annie: I am 17, a senior in high school and have never had a girlfriend. It seems like no matter what I do, I never can find a girl to go out with. Any girl I've managed to date will only go out with me once, and after that, we are just friends.

I freeze up on dates and have no clue why. I've known one girl since I was 3, but for some reason couldn't find a single thing to say to her when we were out. Mind you, I can talk to a girl all day at school, but alone with her, my mind goes blank and she loses interest.

I am tired of this happening every time and don't want to go through the rest of the year like this. I am often told that I am good-looking and kind, but I always manage to mess things up. How can I overcome this? Any input would be greatly appreciated. — Never Kissed a Girl

Dear Never Kissed: Your shyness may be severe enough to qualify as a social anxiety disorder. Still, sometimes all it takes is practice. Because you can carry on a conversation at school, some of these girls may mistake your shyness for boredom or disdain. Prepare a couple of things to say. Ask what she thinks about one of your classes. Tell her she looks nice or that you like her earrings. Smile. Consider going out in a group. Also, you'd be surprised to learn that some women think shy guys are adorable, and if you confess that you are nervous, they will do their best to put you at ease.

Dear Annie: My best friend has a beautiful, bright, articulate, almost-6-year-old daughter, "Kit." They have a nice home and good manners and are fun to be with.

Kit is in kindergarten. When we go out, she is perfectly capable of using the restroom herself. However, at home, Kit prefers to use her potty chair. Unfortunately, the potty chair is kept in the family room, just a few feet from the dining room table. Kit uses the chair in front of whoever is in the room and will also eat dinner and watch TV at the same time.

I've repeatedly suggested that Kit's potty chair should, at the very least, be in the bathroom. But when Kit has to use it, she will pick up the chair and carry it to wherever she wants. Last week, she brought it next to the TV and proceeded to poop in it. Her mom thought it was hilarious. I told her Kit needed a potty intervention. She suggested I write to Annie's Mailbox. What suggestions do you have? — Deborah in Los Angeles

Dear Deborah: We have to admit we laughed, but we're on your side. Kit needs to confine her toilet activities to the bathroom, and Mom should encourage this instead of turning a blind eye. It doesn't do Kit any favors or teach her anything useful by allowing her to carry her potty chair all over the house and poop in front of company. Better that she stops this sooner rather than later.