Hawaii is paradise — with infernally high prices

To start today's column, I'm afraid I'll have to make some of you jealous. Here's how: I just returned from a vacation in Hawaii with my wife.

It's true! I traded 11 February days of rain, snow and cold in Utah for a week and a half in paradise. Undoubtedly the best trade I've ever made.

I watched whales. I snorkeled with sea turtles. I lounged by the pool. I walked around in shorts and sandals. I soaked up the sun.

And I paid a LOT for everything!

I knew everything cost more in Hawaii, and we took that into account when saving for our trip. We were also fortunate that my generous in-laws provided us with a place to stay and transportation, not to mention excellent traveling companions.

But for someone who thinks about his family's finances quite a bit (obsessively, my wife would say), the prices were still a shock.

I knew it was going to be bad when we checked in to our first hotel and the TV commercials for national fast-food chains bragging about their low prices had to add disclaimers. Sure, the ad said a particular item would cost 89 cents, but then words on the screen said that meant $1.49 in Hawaii.

A bacon cheeseburger that would cost me five bucks in Midvale went for at least $8 in Maui. Not that I didn't eat my share of bacon cheeseburgers on vacation (including, literally, a Cheeseburger in Paradise), but that's not the point.

It made me wonder how the average Hawaiian — the teacher or the police officer or the journalist — can afford to live there. Housing alone costs a small fortune.

I guess that's the price of living in a land of endlessly beautiful scenery and nearly perfect weather.

The next big shock to our pocketbook came when purchasing souvenirs for our children. According to my wife, we needed lots of these particular items.

About the only place we found good deals — thanks to a friend who's a Honolulu native — was at a swap meet there. My wife bought everything from red sea salt, dried fruit and jewelry to a wooden frog, a Hawaiian outfit for our son and dresses for our daughters. She even got a purse for herself.

We spent hours there — at least, it seemed like hours to me. But the prices seemed reasonable — until it was time to come home, when all of that shopping looked like it was going to cost us big time.