I THINK I LOVE MY WIFE — * 1/2 — Chris Rock, Kerry Washington, Gina Torres; rated R (profanity, vulgarity, racial epithets, violence, drugs, brief sex, nude photos).

Watching "I Think I Love My Wife" is as excruciating as the marriages and committed relationships that are portrayed in the film.

This insincere, even phony, film is so laugh-challenged that it practically defies its description as a romantic comedy. It's neither romantic nor funny.

And it's definitely not the right vehicle for Chris Rock, who co-wrote and directed the movie and stars as Richard Cooper, a New York investment banker.

Richard is married — apparently happily — to schoolteacher Brenda (Gina Torres, from TV's "Standoff"), though he's got a few complaints when it comes to their romantic side.

Perhaps that's why he's so excited that his old friend Nikki Tru (Kerry Washington, from "The Last King of Scotland") has come back into his life. The lively, hard-partying Nikki is everything that the conservative Brenda is not.

So, despite his protestations about the two of them being "just friends," Richard comes running whenever Nikki calls, and he begins entertaining at least a few thoughts about having her as his mistress.

The film — which was inspired by the 1972 French drama "Chloe in the Afternoon" — appears to be a form of wish fulfillment for the rather goofy-looking Rock, who gets to romance both Washington and Torres onscreen. It's not believable, and his character is so unlikable that you wish they'd both tell him off.

Also, Rock's clumsy direction is actually worse than his performance. The two female leads are better actors, though Rock and co-screenwriter Louis C.K. do everything they can to make their characters look bad. And then the film tries to redeem the character of the wife at the end, which is almost worse.

"I Think I Love My Wife" is rated R for strong sexual language (profanity and crude slang terms), vulgar sexual humor, use of racial epithets, a brief scene of violence (fisticuffs and overheard shootings), drug content (marijuana use and references), brief sexual contact, and glimpses of nude photos. Running time: 94 minutes.

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E-mail: jeff@desnews.com