To borrow a putdown from a past vice presidential debate, we've all seen John Travolta, and Ryan Phillippe, you are no John Travolta. Nor for that matter are you Mark Wahlberg.

Yet that's evidently the caliber of performance filmmaker Mark Christopher was expecting from his young star, who is prominently featured in "54," a shoddy disco-era drama that attempts to meld "Saturday Night Fever" with "Boogie Nights."

But rather than emulate Travolta's performance in the former, Phillippe appears to be aping that actor's dumb Italian guy role as Vinnie Barbarino in TV's "Welcome Back, Kotter." To make matters worse, comedian Mike Myers has a prominent role as nightclub owner Steve Rubell, which leads to some unintentional laughs as he attempts to be dramatic.

Actually, the best thing about this otherwise dull movie is the music — the soundtrack features well-known disco hits from Chic, Diana Ross and the Miracles.

The utterly superficial story is fact-based, though many of the main characters are fictional, and centers on New Jersey teen Shane O'Shea (Phillippe), whose good looks help him get in the door of the infamous '70s Manhattan nightclub 54.

Working as a busboy, Shane falls in with a group of young dreamers, including coatcheck girl Anita (Salma Hayek), a would-be musician, and her husband, Greg (Breckin Meyer).

However, despite the fact that he meets and courts his dream girl, soap star Julie Black (Neve Campbell), Shane soon learns that pseudo-celebrity has its price, as his job strains relations with his family and puts him at odds with his friends.

Unfortunately, Christopher's script isn't nearly thoughtful as it pretends to be, even though it makes some lame attempts to address some intriguing issues about the disco decade, such as rampant drug use and casual sex. And as a director, he's unable to elicit convincing performances from any of the cast members.

As mentioned, Phillippe is awful, and both Hayek and Campbell seem uninspired. But they're all wonderful in comparison to Myers, whose acting has never been as horrible as it is here. In fact, it almost makes you look forward to that "Austin Powers" sequel.

"54" is rated R for profanity, scenes depicting drug use, simulated sex, lewd dancing and use of vulgar slang, male and female nudity, violent shoving and restraint, and use of ethnic slurs.