From Deseret News archives:
Polygamy, abuse may seem baffling to kids
Sangeeta Singg, a psychology professor at Angelo State University in San Angelo, said some younger children may react with uninterest or confusion. Others, especially teens, may produce tough questions, she said.
In general, experts say that parents should answer only what children actually ask honestly and with brevity without delving into extraneous information that might confuse them.
The issues are especially thorny because they move through the realms of faith and belief, said Wilma Heflin, adjunct professor of children's ministry at Hardin-Simmons University in Abilene, Texas.
"Regardless of age, all children are growing and developing physically, intellectually, socially and emotionally," she said. "Sometimes we forget that they are also growing spiritually and that their concept of God is developing."
Events such as those happening in Eldorado may cause children to worry about their own safety and security, Heflin said. But they can also "affect deeply children's concept of God," she said.
The most important thing for a child of any age is a sense of trust, assurance of unconditional love and a personal sense of security, she said.
So even children who are in safe, normal settings may experience fear and anxiety from news reports about events such as those in Eldorado.
Parents should emphasize that one girl, a 16-year-old sect member, "called and asked for help," and that the police and officials removing the children are "responding to her call and want all the children to be safe," Heflin said.
"People who are caring for the children who were removed are trying to show them what God is really like," she said. "They ... are offering them food, comfort and safety."
Tom Copeland, associate professor of psychology at Hardin-Simmons, said parents should not be dishonest when children ask tough questions.
"That's always a mistake," he said. " ... One of the basic guidelines is that if they're old enough to ask, they're old enough to get a real answer."
Children ask questions because they are curious, because they are scared and because they honestly don't know an answer and "really need to understand it better," he said.
Different children are able to handle varying degrees of information.
Recent comments
How do we protect our kids from the lies and myths with which they...
Anonymous | April 13, 2008 at 9:01 a.m.
please get a clue.
these children are being abused. their parents...
dear Concerned Parent | April 11, 2008 at 2:49 p.m.
Mr. Johnson mentions that "Parents may want to reassure their...
Concerned Parent | April 11, 2008 at 10:00 a.m.
- Real Salt Lake: Game at a glance 12:36 a.m.
- Paper circulation worse than it looks 12:28 a.m.
- RSL wins MLS Cup on penalty kicks 12:22 a.m.
- Editorial: Cancer screening 12:15 a.m.
- Afterthoughts 12:15 a.m.
- Treat teachers with respect, trust 12:15 a.m.
- 'Reform' helps old, hurts young 12:15 a.m.
- Letters: No DUI law is too strict 12:15 a.m.
- Letters: Sportsmanship lacking 12:15 a.m.
- Letters: Ticket price misleading 12:15 a.m.
- BYU records with win
- Glenn Beck to enter politics?
- Jazz outlast Pistons in overtime
- Cougars turn focus to dreaded rivals
- Cougars put the fun back in football
- Former BYU professor remembered
- Kirilenko heating up for the Jazz
- Police link alcohol to murder
- Wendover airfield's legacy lost?
- Florida No. 1, TCU 4 in AP Top 25
- Buttars wants to limit gay rights laws
202 - Glenn Beck to enter politics?
190 - Palin plans tour stop in Utah
178 - BYU records with win
129 - RSL wins MLS Cup on penalty kicks
126 - Palin's book shows she's unqualified
125 - Officer cleared in Cardall Taser case
103 - BYU cuts Women's Research Inst.
100 - Jazz finally win in San Antonio
98 - Utes knock off rival Aggies
93
A little after midnight Wednesday morning, about 21 hours ago as I write...
There's a lot of reason to leave your plastic home as you shop:
Nicky Rimando is my hero! I love that guy. He has had his detractors, but...
Two stars means nothing! We played as a team and it showed! I'm still in...
After 15 years, MLS has really grown. Packed seats for the MLS Cup was truly...
I can't believe Donovan hit his PK over the crossbar! Hopefully it won't...
Liberals are not scared of Beck and Palin at all. If you could read the posts...
South Salt Lake will be well served by Mayor Wood!
congrats javi! i felt for him too. must've been a huge blow to have to leave...
I am so happy right now, I can't sleep. We had friends and family over, it...
Mr. Elmont, Ever seen an NFL halftime show?
Alrighty then. Repeal anti-religious discrimination laws....all you...

