She would have been more admired had she been less awkward, more adored had she been less plain, more esteemed had she been less foolish, more respected had she been less poor, more alive had she been less dead. — Melina Gottling

BEST SENTENCE CHANNELING STEPHENIE "TWILIGHT" MEYER CATEGORY

As his crystalline eyes met mine, I swooned under the power of his unblinking gaze, I marveled at the statuesque breadth of his shoulders and the bulk of his chest, and I wondered at the knowledge that this man I loved was zombie who wanted desperately to eat me. — Laura Middleton

PERFECT SENTENCE TO END OUR CONTEST WITH CATEGORY

If I was smart, which I ain't, and if I had a real job, which I don't, and if I had something better to do, which I don't, I wouldn't be wasting my time, which I am, and spending money, which I don't have, and buying postage stamps, which I need, in order to enter your silly contest — which I am. — Raymond Mayo

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Author's note: Again, thanks to all who entered. You made me laugh out loud. Be sure to check out www.bulwer-lytton.com. Professor Scott Rice has graciously provided a link to our contest.