NFL 2007: Survey says ...

The presses almost came to a stop the other day — at least they should have. More important things were pressing than putting out a daily paper. News, schmooze. It was time for staffers to postpone productivity and participate in the Deseret Morning News' first (and likely last) annual NFL season questionnaire.

As you read the survey's results, just remember: We're not NFL experts. We — meaning those who didn't trash the soul-soliciting pigskin poll e-mail like it was another V1@gr& spam message — just play them in the paper.

So — "Stop the presses!" — Here's how we see the upcoming NFL season shaking out:

SUPER BOWL XLII CHAMPION?

Predicted winner: New England Patriots

First runner-up: Indianapolis Colts

Second attendant: Pittsburgh Steelers

Miss Congenialities: Dallas Cowboys, New Orleans Saints, San Diego Chargers, Chicago Bears, St. Louis Rams

Miss Teen South Carolina: South Africa, er, Iraq, er, Cleveland Browns

SUPER BOWL XLII SHOWDOWN?

Predicted championship match-up: New England Patriots vs. New Orleans Saints

The vice-participants: Indianapolis Colts vs. Philadelphia Eagles and/or Dallas Cowboys (perhaps at the same time so NFC can finally win again)

Tag-team trio tilt: San Diego Chargers vs. Pittsburgh Steelers vs. Chicago Bears

The Also Getting Votes Bowl: Baltimore Ravens vs. St. Louis Rams

First in line to buy tickets: Houston Texans vs. Oakland Raiders

DIVISION PREDICTIONS

AFC NORTH

1. Steelers

2. Bengals

3. Ravens

4. Browns

AFC EAST

1. Patriots

2. Jets

3. Dolphins

4. Bills

AFC SOUTH

1. Colts

2. Jaguars

3. Titans

4. Texans

AFC WEST

1. Chargers

2. Broncos

3. Chiefs

4. Raiders

NFC NORTH

1. Bears

2. Vikings

3. Packers

4. Lions

NFC EAST

1. Eagles

2. Cowboys

3. Giants

4. Redskins

NFC SOUTH

1. Saints

2. Panthers

3. Falcons

4. Buccaneers

NFC WEST

1. Seahawks

2. 49ers

3. Rams

4. Cardinals

MOST VALUABLE PLAYER?

He'll Be THE MAN: LaDainian Tomlinson, Chargers

Most Valuable Papa: Tom "J.E.T. fan" Brady, Patriots

QBs Who Could Be: Peyton Manning, Colts; Ben Roethlisberger, Steelers

QB Who Couldn't Be: Dial 1-800-BAD-NEWZ for answer

One-vote wonder: Larry Johnson, Chiefs

MOST OVERRATED?

(clap, clap, clap)

Dismember the Titan: Vince Young, Titans

He's not that good, doggone it!: Michael Vick, Bad Newz Kennelz

Rhymes with BO: T.O. aka "Terrible" Owens, Cowboys

Ouchie Stinko: Chad Johnson, Bengals

Don't let him hold the china: Tony Romo, Cowboys

False advertisement: Reggie Bush, Texans; Tom Brady, Patriots; Shaun Alexander, Seahawks; Randy Moss, Patriots; Ben Roethlisberger, Steelers; Larry Johnson, Chiefs

ROOKIE OF THE YEAR?