From Deseret News archives:

Utahns in 'midlife' find fulfillment as they change course, take road less traveled

Published: Monday, May 21, 2007 12:08 a.m. MDT
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Crandell writes, "When we're young, salary figures high among our concerns.... We need money to launch ourselves in life — to purchase a house, pay for a growing family. By midlife, the picture has changed. Money has paled as a motivator among the men and women I interviewed; we no longer define our worth by our tax bracket.... Second choices come from the heart. Some people are working longer hours at their reinvented job, but it doesn't matter, because they love their work. Others have finally found the confidence to lay down the terms of their employment.... Perhaps the best payoff of all for remaking our work life is the message it sends to our kids. When we refuse to settle for a humdrum job or trade dollars for satisfaction, we're showing the next generation what it means to have fulfilling work."

Denny Nestripke was 52 when he decided to redirect his life. He'd been an accountant, helping companies file their financial reports with the Securities and Exchange Commission. He says, "I got to where I thought I should be more involved in helping people just survive, rather than making the rich richer."

So he enrolled at the University of Utah to get a master's degree in family ecology. Along the way he volunteered as a court-appointed special advocate, befriending two young men who are in state custody, living in secure facilities. He also helped several nonprofit organizations develop a budget and an economic plan.

After he graduated, however, he could never find a paying job with one of those nonprofits. So he continues to volunteer and, to support himself, has resurrected his accounting business.

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He's glad he went back to school, he says. He gained a new outlook on relationships and a greater understanding of the American economy — for instance, how various laws affect single mothers. When you are an accountant, you focus on rules, he says. Sociologists, on the other hand, look at trends and adaptations, and there is not always a right answer, he learned.

And because he has volunteered as an advocate with the same young man for several years now, he's been able to see some progress in that one life. Week after week, Nestripke often has been the boy's only visitor. The young man has gradually learned to trust him and count on him, Nestripke says.

Sara Davidson, 64, took three years to write a book about baby boomers finding the next stage of their lives ("Leap!" Random House, $25.95). In the process of writing, Davidson discovered all the things she did not want to do with the rest of her own life.

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