From Deseret News archives:

Buddy, can you spare a square?

Published: Tuesday, May 1, 2007 12:08 a.m. MDT
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I don't know about you, but I get a little nervous whenever celebrities feel the need to impart their wisdom on American culture or politics. Their personal lives are train wrecks, but, sure, go ahead and tell us how to fix the world.

How far is Crow willing to take this TP idea? Does she write her songs on paper — or one square of TP? Maybe she writes on rock walls with chalk. Who knows?

The word is we've all got to do our part. Next: Goldie Hawn and Al Gore tell us to stop running marathons because all that panting can't be good for global warming.

Maybe presidential adviser Karl Rove got wind of Crow's one-square-a-day idea (so to speak), when he went Liza Minnelli on her at a recent function in Washington, D.C. Crow approached Rove to try to convert him to global warming. When he turned away, she reached out and touched his arm. "Don't touch me," Rove shot back at her.

Can you blame him?

After that, the conversation went something like:

Crow: "You can't speak to us like that."

Rove: "Yes, I can. Did you use only one square!!!???"

I'm not the first to say this: Trees are a crop, like corn. Nobody is making paper out of the redwoods. There are actual tree farms planted specifically for use in building homes and making newsprint and toilet paper.

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So keep using it, and lots of it. And not just for the pesky situations, either.


Doug Robinson's column runs on Tuesday. Please send e-mail to drob@desnews.com.

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