Don't blame Fido for his accidents

Housebreaking problems are among the most impossible to live with — and by far the most costly. It's a $40 million a year problem, and it drives people batty. But oh, the excuses! "He was mad at me for working late." "He hates my boyfriend." "She gets upset when I rearrange the furniture."

Dogs do not eliminate inside out of spite or revenge. People mistakenly attribute those human behaviors to dogs. If your dog does his business in your house, it is because: He was never properly housebroken; he has a medical condition that requires attention; he is drinking too much water or eating too much food; and/or he wasn't taken out when he should've been. None of which are his fault.

Housebreaking is a people problem, not a dog problem. Your dog is quite OK with where and when he goes. You're the one who wants it the way you want it, so you're the one who has to teach him. And you can teach him. You do not have to live with this problem.

A couple of things:

1. Housebreaking means the dog never eliminates in the house. NEVER. A little bit is not OK. Only on Thanksgiving and his birthday is not OK. Housebreaking is the opposite of paper training. Paper training teaches your dog to eliminate inside, but never really works. Housebreaking teaches your dog to eliminate outside — and only outside. And it does work.

Also known as Toy-Dog Syndrome, chronic housebreaking problems rarely involve large breeds. A 140-pound Newfoundland could flood your living room, which motivates big-dog owners to fully embrace the concept. Little-dog owners, however, tend toward excuses like, "Oh, but Tinkles is tiny — she only produces a teaspoon, and she only does it once a week!" ... Right. What damage could she possibly do? Let's see: One teaspoon, once a week, 52 weeks a year, over the course of 12 years. ... Would you pour 624 teaspoons of urine onto your carpet? So why let your dog do it when there is a better way?

2. Punishment is not teaching. It is unfair to punish your dog for not intuiting your grand plan for the elimination of his waste. You must first teach him what you want, and then correct — don't punish — him when he makes a mistake. To rub your dog's nose in his own mess — the great myth — is to accomplish nothing, except to create a fearful and possibly aggressive dog.