"She's a good mom. I think through it all she's been pretty solid for them," Nolan said.

It was the thought of what the future might hold for her boys that motivated Snyder to end her abusive 5-year relationship with her husband. The children saw their dad yell and hit her. She watched them become angry and excessively aggressive toward her and each other. She worried about them becoming abusers.

"That was one of my main concerns. I know this is a cycle. The cycle is going to break with these boys," Snyder said.

Since leaving American Samoa more than a year ago, Snyder has continued to get regular therapy for 5-year-old Patrick and occasionally for 4-year-old Ma'i, even at the expense of getting help herself.

"I just thought their counseling was more important than mine because I can handle things a little better than they can," she said. "Their whole world was turned upside down."

Snyder is determined to rear them in a loving environment free from intimidation and violence. Calling therapy "crucial," she said it has made a marked difference in her sons' behavior, she said. "It's helped them get along better," she said.

She is managing three rambunctious boys. During an interview in her apartment on a chilly winter day, the boys want her to fill up water guns. It takes a toll on Snyder.

Snyder works at several hospitals registering patients. She juggles shifts to ensure time with her children and to get them to counseling appointments. She tries to volunteer weekly at the elementary school where Patrick attends kindergarten.

"I don't have much me-time," she says. "But I figure that will come."

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E-mail: romboy@desnews.com; lucy@desnews.com