From Deseret News archives:
Batterers often get custody of children
Former director of center says abusers learn how to manipulate system
Amy Jensen, former director of All-R-Kids Supervised Visitation Center in Murray, said perpetrators had custody of the children in at least a third of the 30 families who used the center in the past year.
"I'm not OK with children being placed in offenders' custody," she said.
The center, a houselike setting with play rooms and a kitchen, allows abusers regular, monitored hourlong visits with their children. It is the only one in the state exclusively for domestic violence cases.
Studies show 50 percent to 70 percent of spouse abusers also beat or emotionally torment their children, she said.
Kathy and her husband split in 1999. Two years ago the court awarded him custody in what has become a prolonged dispute. Separation from her now-10-year-old son, who lives with his father in another state, has caused her more anguish than what she described as an abusive marriage.
"I wish I had just stayed," she said.
Kathy contends a court-appointed custody evaluator ignored her years as a victim of physical and emotional abuse. "It's a he said, she said," Kathy recently told a state legislative committee.
Kathy wants state lawmakers to set standards for custody evaluators and cap fees for their work. Evaluators charge a minimum of $5,000, she said.
"Money becomes an issue in these custody evaluations," Kathy said. "The one who has the most money wins."
Domestic violence custody cases are "so messy that people just don't want to touch them," Painter told the committee.
Abusers have learned how to use the child welfare and court systems to obtain custody of their children, Jensen said. They come across as charming, stable and polite. But they employ the same controlling and manipulative tactics they did in their families. They make false reports, file numerous courts motions and seek child protective orders in attempt to create confusion. They recast themselves as victims, she said.
"They know how to talk in order to get what they want. This is what they do all day," Jensen said.
Meantime, traumatized mothers come across as unstable, depressed and scattered. "She is going to look like she's not together," Jensen said.
The courts have attempted to address the custody evaluation issue with guidelines for judges, said Rick Schwermer. Evaluators must be licensed clinical social workers, doctorate level psychologists, psychiatrists or marriage and family therapists. If they do not have training in domestic violence counseling, they must consult with a colleague who does.
Schwermer said he doesn't know if that happens.
The courts tried, he said, but were unable put together a roster of qualified evaluators.
E-mail: romboy@desnews.com
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This is very true. I am a surviver of domestic violence. I suffer...
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